I cheated and I

I fucked up. I hate myself and Im sick with guilt. I never thought I was capable of doing something so cruel.

Now Im terrified of how to proceed. Do I have to tell my boyfriend? I honestly love the man so much and I want nothing more than to be with him. I cant believe I could do something like this to hurt him.

It was a drunk, one time mistake. Ill never do it again because Im never drinking like that again. This has been a wake up call. If I tell him, I think he would be absolutely devastated and leave me. But I love the guy so fucking much. I really want to put it behind me and focus on being a faithful, good girlfriend.

Any advice would be much appreciated. Im just a fucking wreck right now. I cant eat, I cant sleep, I cant do anything but think about how bad I just fucked everything up. Please help.