Lonely

Lately I’ve been feeling off, I honestly don’t know what to do I've been trying to distract myself from hurts myself even more than I have been. But it’s honestly been difficult, for about 2 or 3 months I've tried to cut myself, I did a couple of time but my sister sorta noticed, and All I've said is that it was an accident that I was just clumsy or that when I was cooking I accidentally cut myself I even said that it was our dog that’s she was a little rough while playing around.

I don’t know what to do I want to tell my mother but then she would just got to her boyfriend and they would sit me down to talk about it and make it a big deal instead of just talking me to someone, they have done it before when I was in middle school, I was going to depression and I had called a suicide prevention hotline that the school had provided us with and later on the cops had showed up my sisters saw that I was talking to them and told my mom and her boyfriend, she had came out to see what was going on and they told her to just go back into that house they were just going to as a few questions because I called the suicide prevention hotline, when I was done and went back in the house I tried to go to my room but the made me sit down, that made a big deal about it and told my whole family, and I’m my opinion I feel like that was unnecessary because my family shouldn’t be in my business like that but i guess they should know but I still feel like they honestly shouldn’t have told them essentially on the same day they had found out, but yeah that is a reason why I don’t want to tell her.

I'm sorry if that was too much but I just couldn’t stop I guess, I’ve honestly never been a social person, I’ve always kept to myself I barely even had friends grown up I was always getting bullied and I got into fights a lot so yeah I guess.