Mother -child relationships are hard.

I'm able to finally admit how hard it is to deal with my mother. We have an at-best strained relationship.

I'm also finally able to realize and admit that my mother is frankly downright abusive.

This is really hard for me to even discuss but I've realized so much about this --- and had so many realizations about how she is a toxic person and I had to cut her out of my life.

It's a really hard thing to admit. It's harder to accept, but I'm on the road to figuring out that the parent-child bond only works if both parties are willing to grow from their mistakes and do better.