Need daring advice
Im 28f I've been chatting with this guy 27 for 3 weeks before we met up. We've been meeting for about 1 month and always end up fooling around in someway. We both still live with parents so can't go to the others house for a movie or anything. We always go for a drive and have really good chats. He shows interest in my life and tells me about his. Recently he shows me some favourite spots of his.
Is he only meeting up with me for sex? This is my first experience with a guy as I've spent years battling anxiety and depression.
Please help
@generousNorth6926
Why can't you go to a house for a movie? You are very much adults? Might actually be a good way to test the waters NOT getting too physical? At least not past hugging/kissing/cuddling under a blanket? A lot of that depends more on how your parents treat you (adults or children?) and privacy, etc.
One of you could cook the other dinner or something since it would be at a house one of you know?
There isn't much of a way to know about the sex part I don't think, unless you can plan some activities where that is not possible to get up to. Without being a stereotypical guy here, my last relationship one day we were making out on the couch and she told me we couldn't do any more as it was that time of the month. I had zero issues with that and told her such and went back to kissing. It could have been a test, or maybe not, but didn't matter to me since I wasn't seeing her only for that. But we had worked up to it. Few dates before kissing, then a few kissing dates before sexy times..
@purpleSail7825
When we were chatting before we met up I had made it clear that I didn't know when anything would happen as I really nervous and he assured me that he didn't mind I'm just worried ive ruined it now.
@generousNorth6926
I guess the best thing is to just enjoy each others company. The more you each end up opening up and talking about things that are non-sexual, the more I think you will be comfortable that you two are together for more than the physical. If things are only physical then you would find conversation that strays far from that topic (childhood memories, vacations, etc.) less likely to be reciprocated, and more strained.
@purpleSail7825
So basically next time we meet just try and have a good time enjoy each other's company and don't get too physical
@generousNorth6926
It's not that you need to TRY and not be physical, but just try to look at it from the outside a bit. As you are together, talking, before anything physical might happen, are you both laughing, smiling? Actually showing interest in what the other has to say, responding and asking questions and relating your own stories? If so, you are probably good!
@purpleSail7825
Yes we chat laugh and joke before anything happens even when driving he reaches over and hold my hand or puts his hand on my knee.
I struggle with anxiety so think I'm just really over thinking it
@generousNorth6926
Sounds good to me. I get the anxiety part. From the guy's stand point, I've never had a thought if the gal was using me for sex, but I completely understand the overthinking part. Like 100x. So I also know there isn't much anyone can say that helps it, other than really just try to enjoy each other's company and whatever you two do together. As long as you are both happy, that's what matters!
@purpleSail7825
Thank you that actually makes me feel a little better