Struggle with intimacy
Hi there!
Im just going to jump straight to the point.
Im getting married in November to the love of my life. Weve been together since 2016 and he is my first intimate partner.
We were together for a month when I had to leave to work on a cruise liner. I was there for 3 months when I got transferred to another one. The night before I was to leave for the nee ship. We partied a bit, I got intoxicated and was sexually assaulted by someone I dont know. The next day I had to leave and could not tell anyone about the situation since I was underage at the time and could lose my job.
I quit my job on the liners 4 months into my contract because, mentally I just could not cope.
I came back home and things went well in the relationship, but the past 2 years Ive really been struggling to be intimate with my partner. Anything sexual just does not do it for me. I love him so much an its taking a toll on our relationship, but I just dont know how to get things back to normal. (Which it probably will never be again) but I would like to experience intimacy like before with him, without feeling completely disconnected.
@Marie2895
I too was sexually assalted as a teen (and molested as a child) and did not tell anyone initially. It did take a toll on my relationship and I had to eventually tell my husband what had happened because there were playful gestures that would trigger me. It took me almost 30 years to really see how being abused had impacted so many of my personal and professional relationships because I was having trouble trusting anyone.
Therapy has definitely helped me and I too would recommend it for you as well. I wish you all the best.
