Tips to get over someone?
Hi everyone.
So long story short, I'm in love with someone who has a girlfriend, and I don't know how to deal with it, mostly because I'm not sure if he doesn't like me back...
We've been friends for a while now and we get along really well, as time went by we got closer and we have a pretty strong relationship now. I never meant for it to turn to anything else but I've started to like him, and honestly I've never felt this way before. I'm 22 and I've been in a long term relationship before, but I didn't feel anything close to this.. I honestly think I'm in love. I like every little detail about him, and I feel so safe with him. And he worrys about me so much, and gives me a safe place to go when I get overwhelmed with anxiety or depression, I can text him and invites me over and we don't even talk, it's a very comforting silence that always calms me down. I really really like him..
Now here's the thing, I don't really know how he feels.. we've kissed and we've slept together (just sleeping, nothing happened), but he is in a relationship.. please don't judge me for doing it but I've really been struggling with my feelings and in the moment I couldn't say no. But his relationship is kinda of wierd. They've been together for 3 years and she is his first girlfriend. But they keep getting into fights and having troubles. We all go to the same university, and I've seen them pass by each other and not even say hi or anything whatsoever. He never talks about her, he always comes up to me really excited to tell me all of his stories but he never mentions her. I really do not understand what's going on. I guess I just needed to rant and get this of my chest. I'm trying to get over him but we are friends regardless of everything and I really do not want to lose that. Before I even had feelings for him we already had a really good friendship and I really cherish that friendship, I don't want to lose it.
..
I feel really overwhelmed with I feel for him, I've never felt like this before
(Sorry for any language errors, I hadn't written anything in English in years now)
It does sound like he likes you. At least if you guys have kissed and he feels comfortable sleeping around you. Sometimes guys don't like to share what's happening between them and their girlfriend though, so that's not that surprising. I would say it's at least worth asking about how he feels about you. Don't ask if he's willing to break up with his girlfriend, as that might be too much for him in the moment.
I've recently told a girl that I'm friends with that I liked her and it didn't really go how I had hoped, but it wasn't the end of the world. We're still friends. We still laugh, talk, and kinda act like nothing happened. I'd be lying though if I said I didn't feel some pain whenever I see her. Although I guess it's still better than never taking the chance to begin with. I wish I could give you more advice, but I'm still trying to navigate personal relationships myself.
Best wishes, Cain