Trust issues ?
How do I trust my boyfriend more . We have been together for 3 years and I still struggle to trust my boyfriend. The reasoning why I haven’t been able to trust was due to past dating issues. Recently not so long ago we had a fight about me not trusting him . Last night I had a scary dream about how he was surrounded by all these girls that bullied me and in the dream he was yelling at me but I don’t recall what he said . But then he ended up leaving me in with the females. What do I do . My boyfriend thinks I need to see a therapist.
Hi :)
Thank you for sharing. I’m very sorry you’re going through this. It can be very hard to unlearn the defense mechanisms we develop due to past trauma. It’s very understandable that you’re having trust issues because, as you mentioned, previous romantic partners have been unfaithful to you. My question is, are there any triggers in your current relationship that you and your partner can work on? For example, does your partner have good communication skills? Do you feel like he openly expresses his feelings and makes himself available or is he reserved/ secretive, making you constantly wonder what he’s thinking, feeling or doing and further amplifying the feelings of doubt and uncertainty you struggle with? If the answer is yes, then you should have a serious conversation about communicating effectively. A lack of communication or ambiguity of any kind can make anyone feeling anxious regardless of past trauma. If not, a sincere conversation where you make yourself vulnerable to the person you love and express that you’re trying do your best to make things out and need their support is something to consider in my opinion. A caring partner should be understanding.
Finally, working out something that’s clearly bothering you and your loved ones with a professional is never a bad idea.
all the best <3