Trying to figure out.
I was in a relationship with someone for 9 years and we were mostly happy. He became different and started avoiding my feelings and when I tried to confront him to sort things out, he didn't. He got insecure of one of my male friend and that friend meant so much of me. We fought daily over petty things and he started doubting us and then starting having issues over every little thing. So after months of trying and asking him to understand I Ieft him even after when I loved him. And when it finally hit him that I left he started apologising me to come back but I was pretty sure that I want to do this on my own now. Then after a month I started liking my friend. And now after two months, I got back with my ex boyfriend because he never stopped trying and I felt lonely but I had to let go of my friend. I thought I would be finally happy by getting back but all I feel is a void. I miss my friend so much and I am so confused how could I put him over this guy who is really ready to make this okay. Please help me.
Would it be possible to seek couples counseling? Maybe it's worth talking through these feelings in a safe, judgment-free environment. If that's not possible, I recommend asking him if he trusts you, and how it would make him feel if you forbid him to see one of his friends. His feelings — regardless of your feelings toward this friend — should have zero bearing on your relationships and how you choose to spend your time. If he can't recognize that his behavior is controlling, it might be time to leave, even if you still care about him, because the bottom line is that he's harming you.
