What
He cheated. I decided we could work through it. Three weeks later he didnt come home because he was at her house all night. I gave the ultimatum...3 strikes and youre out. A few weeks after that I found a secret cell phone...22 dating/ hookup sites, 7 email addresses, and 2 cell phones.
I told him to leave but he was only gone for a week...I couldnt leave him homeless. So we are obviously living together again, and hes acting like everything is ok, but part of me believes it is complete BS.
Can you ever come back from something like this? Will I ever be able to trust him again? Do I want to? For all I know he already has another secret phone and nothing has changed.
Whats a girl to do...
@whoknows1952 Hi I'm so sorry your going through that, I know that has to be a tough place to be. Its very hard to let go of someone you love even when they are toxic for you. I think sometimes the hardest thing to do is to put your feelings before theirs because some of us are just wired to be more compassionate than others. If he was going that far to cheat then the chances of him never doing it again are not very likely plus you deserve more than to be someones back up plan! It doesn't matter if hes homeless or not, he put hisself in this situation and you have to do whats best for you. Its hard to walk away from someone you love but if you show him that he can do that to you and just walk back into your life then that cycle is sure to repeat. Remember, time doesn't always make the pain go away but it does ease it. I hope everything works out for you!
You need to do what is right for you.
Just by what you have explain in your post it sounds like he's fine because he got away with his behaviour and still has his cake and gets to eat it too. Trust is the backbone of a relationship and if he won't do everything he needs to to help build that trust up again with you then it's not worth it.
You are worth the effort.