Why won’t he compromise?

Me (31,F) and my fiancé (42,M) have been together 11 years and have a child together. He refuses to go to any social events (holidays, birthdays, etc)with me whether it’s friends or family. He says he doesn’t like my siblings, friends, or extended family and that act fake and annoying when I am with them. Well thanksgiving is coming up and I really want him to go! It’s at my brother’s gf’s house so it makes him not want to go even worse. I’m sick of having to find an excuse on why he is not with me. Last year we went camping just the 3 of us but this year I want to be with my family. I just don’t understand why we can’t come to some kind of compromise. This is definitely not something to break up over but I’m sick of it. Did I let it go on for too long? Do I just squash my feelings and learn to live with it? This is why we have been engaged for so long because we can’t agree on a wedding. I want a wedding and he could stay engaged forever and ‘if I really wanted to be married we can go to the courthouse’. I’ve said we can compromise and get eloped somewhere where I can wear a dress and have pictures and have just our parents there. He says he doesn’t want pictures because I would post them all over social media and that’s so fake of me. Help! How do I get him to meet me in the middle?