How do you even start to love yourself?

I’ve been struggling with my self-image a lot with getting a new job, whether it’s about my competence or how I look. And today after talking with my partner I’m realizing that my insecurities have gotten so out of control that it’s affecting those around me because I am afraid that I’m not enough for them. It scared me and broke my heart, and I’ve never hated myself so much. But it also made me realize how much hating myself in large and small ways is a constant presence in my life. I want to change that to give myself peace and also show up as a better person for the people I love. I just have no idea where I’m even supposed to start.