Sh reasons? (Sorry this might be triggering I'm not sure)
I know most of us sh for the pain as a coping thing and that's how it started for me too. But its got to a point where it doesn't make me feel better from the pain like I don't really feel anything well it still hurts obviously but idk how to explain it like it hurts but like omg if yk what i mean then yeah. I have no idea how to put it in words but doing it is a visual thing whenever I see what I've done to myself its so relaxing like the same feeling when you've spent the whole day out and finally get into bed. Some times I just sit in bed staring at my cuts because it makes me feel good about myself.
But I haven't done it in a hot minute and the old scars are fading and the "newer" cuts' scabs are gone and also not that visible, my skin doesn't scar easy at all no matter how deep I cut and now its making me feel like what I did wasn't valid. I really want to relapse because I miss being able to just see it all the time like in the shower, going to the bathroom, and just sitting in bed and pulling down my pants to see and now that I dont have anything to see its driving me crazy.
And becauseim a 15y girl whenever i try to speak to people they assume im attention seeking. All these people tell me I'm an attention seeker or little baby and it makes me want to believe i guess but i know im.not doing it for that reason so idk why im saying this. I do everything i can to hide this from my family and friends because they've recovered and i feel stupid or left behind but thats a whole dif topic. I NEED to know what is wrong with me or if anyone knows what tf this means and if anyone else goes through this and how you cope please.
I hope this isn't hard to read i can't be bothered doing proper paragraphs and things
@crimsonPenguin4888
I'm glad you are not doing it now and are safe!
You deserve to be happy and fund healthier coping mechanisms .
Thank you for sharing,bits worth it, even if it helps one person 💖
@crimsonPenguin4888 hey I have some interesting perspectives from a cutter, or ex cutter according to how im labeled, im also currently dealing with my fourteen year old daughter struggling with this currently, if you want feel free to reach out to me
Hey, I’m so sorry you feel this way. I’m dealing with the same question: “Why” and I’ve got no answer. That was driving me crazy too, but I feel better when I stopped asking. It’s really really hard to accept it and I don’t even know how I managed to do so.
Just know that you are not the only one, not alone <3 And it is ok to not know why you did it. It doesn’t mean there has to be something “wrong”.
I wish you a lot of strength and moments that make you smile <3
Hey. First of all youre not doing this for attention or bc youre a little baby.
About your experience with the cutting... i can 100% relate as a cutter. The feeling of wanting to see it, almost like 'artwork'. I totaly get it.
You could try some things. I know its the typical og method but the rubber band helped me in many of those moments. Its visable because it gets red and raised. Also try stuff like drawing on your skin. Use as many different colors you want to make it look exactly how youd cut. Or just using not so sharp things to gently scratch so it also causes visable lines.
Hope any of those ideas help. I know it from myself coping methods dont always work but its worth a shot.
:)