I feel numb

@Stormandshelter

Hey there , I get an impression that you are going through your tough times. I know how much numb one can feel when noone understands them for a long time. Some people around us stop to caring after some point too. Our efforts go unnoticed and unappreciated . I understand how much of a struggle it is to remind yourselves that you still exsist though no one really notices you . We cannot always say the difference between both . It leaves one so much numb and hurt. I understand how much you crave to feel something else , to distract yourself and give yourself a break , to relieve yourself from those heavy thoughts . It breaks my heart to know that you had to cut and scratch youself for that Noone deserves to go through that.

You are hurting yourself indeed. But try to remind yourself that you are not destroying yourselves. You are not destroying yourselves. Hurting yourself are serious responses to depression and trauma. It's one way to cope. It's one way many of us choose to survive some tough walks of life . I am aware that it is not a healthy method. But it's it's your way to cope. Don't judge yourself for trying to deal with what life throws our way . Self harm serves a purpose for those who do it. Like you mentioned before, to * feel * anything that can distract you from your other pains , to feel ones hatred, to punish yourselves . You don't deserve it. You don't deserve those cuts and scratches . I know it's hard to believe sometimes. But you don't deserve to be punished this much, for this long , for anything, irrespective of what made the person hate you. You don't deserve this much pain. You don't. You never did.

Not all of the us may get to fix things as fast as we want it to be fixed. It's okay. It's okay. We can take things to a better spot eventually. It's hurtful when you don't get the results immediately. It breaks our spirit. It shatters our willingness to go on. But always know- simply because we didn't get the results we wanted, our efforts doesn't become any less valid. You have tried. And that's a feat of and in itself. It takes a lot of efforts and willingness Please be proud of it. Not many of us may notice your progress, but progress is definitely progress. Only you need to acknowledge it. Because after everything you have been through you owe it to yourself. you are enough the way you are.

The best way to overcome the urge to SH is by sorting out the thoughts and emotions that triggers it. It's a very stressful process. But the results are worth the effort. If you think you would get overwhelmed while doing so( very understandable) , you can take plenty of breaks in between. You can also talk to people you can trust or to listners here . It's hard not to feel worried about how they will take your talks . Irrespective of how they react , try to remember that you are not going to them for them to comfort or help. You are simply talking to another person to feel anchored when your thoughts become overwhelming. Speaking or typing out what you think can give you a more clear and better perspectives.

Also there are self help guides for self harm at cups. You can check them out to make things more manageable.

@Stormandshelter,

And I can't stress this enough, you don't need to do anything or fix anything right away. Do it as much as eventually as you want to. That's enough. You are always enough. However just know that you have ways to make things better. You can . Simply acknowledging that fact makes today's struggle more bearable

Senting lots of hugs love strength and courage. You are already very brave . But keep it in your stock.

I am sorry, it tried to make my reply short. But hey it's me so , that workrd very well . Ops

Hey, dude it happens with me to...and I am worse... I cut vein portion of both hands, (months ago) all because someone left me..... But dude remember no one can help yourself but you face your fears, let anything happen but survive, breathe... I am having anger issues.... I don't completely understand myself but I am trying to... So you said no one understand you,... It's okay you can understand yourself dude,.. I got you🤍

Try to understand that people can go through things that’s very similar to you, but no one will understand because they’re not you, every person and situation is unique in some way shape or form. Don’t let it bother you that no one will understand you, work on understanding yourself and building acceptance.