Why does it work like that **TW**
I don't like my body
Almost always heard (from my dad) you and your sisters are so lazy / you'll nowhere get in live / you're not able to achieve whatever you dream about. And then with my ex bf he told me stuff like: you could go to gym, move more / you're not my type but I'm with you tho etc
My current bf at the start of our relationship was so happy that we're together (after we both wanted this for 8 years and that's for other time) he was giving me a lot... Compliments and my psyche couldn't bare it. I mostly started to cry, scream, throwing things or hitting the wall... After some time he stopped bc he knew what will happen. Now it's rare to hear him saying something and he started to use his Worts wiser.
With the time I started to believe people who told me the worst about myself and when I heard something nice I just smile back and said 'thank you' but in my head was like 'is this Person blind' / 'is she doing this to make me feel bad' / 'am I dirty somewhere'
Does someone have the same experience? I would like to hear your story.
@CamiTheSandwich
It sounds like your dad taught you to criticise yourself, by criticising you from birth. We learn to think from our parents and role models in the early years. So, how they speak to us is how we speak to ourselves and it feels familiar when others speak this way to us also. You are so used to this that you accept it from others. But compliments feel uncomfortable because you weren't used to them.
Does that sound like I am hearing you right?
I find it helps to get brave and ask questions of people when they make comments that feel weird, and I slowly learned to accept other perspectives. Not reactive or argumentative questioning, just genuine curiosity to find out more about their compliments. Just because it feels unfamiliar, doesn't mean it isn't true! 💛