*TW* I tried to fatally self-harm
I'm still alive if you're reading this. Pleased don't try suicide. I'm not sure of my reality anymore and I can't stop crying thinking of how I almost left my family behind. Please fight through the depression. It's not worth the pain you leave behind.
@DumbassSoup
The worst part is not knowing if you're really alive or not.
@DumbassSoup
yes your still alive 
but thats a lot of sleeping pills and it would be a good idea to go to the hospital to make sure you stay that way the full effect of the pills might not have kicked in yet sometimes that could be a few hours with some pills especially if its slow release pills and different things can affect how fast or slow they take full effect
so i hope you go to the hospital you can call emergency to have someone take you there if you dont know anyone who can take you
@DumbassSoup
Do you mean that you took them some time ago, or only perhaps a few hours ago? If it's the latter, please call an ambulance or go to the hospital. It is really important to make sure you are safe, as the pills may have a slow effect.
@DSoup
Hey Soup! I'm so glad you figured this out and it wasn't too late for you. Just as a side note, I had to change the title of your post as well as move it to a different subforum. If you'd like to know more about my reasons, you're free to PM me! Thank you. I hope you find safety and warmth within this subcommunity. ❤️
I am afraid and cautious what to say...you said it right...why leave people in pain behind?... I speak from experience, my example may be old but in my teens I was saved by a very smart trained pharmacist who sold me fake pills instead of sleeping pills reading my crisis on my face and she saved my life. After that I never wanted to end it anymore, I told myself I will go with life, follow my story and my saga nomatter how hard it is.
I have lost a dear friend with the same name as mine, they declared it an accident not self harm for him to be properly burried religiously...it tore our souls apart, his friends, family and girlfriend...
Another one of my friends, she was saved because her friends called emergency immediatelly and she was saved and now she never thinks about doing that but instead helps people...
Please use any crisis resources that you have in your country, reach out to friends and family whom you get along with or with us who are here but you yourself said it, don't put others in pain.
I lost meaning in life yet I go on for some unknown reason...we are meant to be...
I feel for you...