Hi. I'm a wreck

I don't know what I'm doing here. I feel like a hypochondriac. I guess I should start from the beginning. I'm a golden child: straight A's, private school, perfect family. I was always the chubbiest person in my family, so I guess I could never view myself as skinny. At a physical, I had a 23.4 BMI. Most of it was muscle, but that didn't matter to me. After being bulemic and anorexic for a couple months, I felt lower than dirt. I cut the first time after a fight with my best friend of eight years. It wasn't deep, but it was enough to stop the pain. That was in late November. By January I was cutting three times a day. No one noticed because I only cut on my upper thigh where even shorts don't show. My sister had developed an eating disorder as well. She was depressed and wasn't afraid to show it. A part of me was jealous because I just bottled up the pain. Every day she called me ugly and fat. Then I would go to school and wear the mask. I would smile for my parents when she threatened to kill herself. My friend started having symptoms of an eating disorder too. I cut so they didn't have to feel the pain. I stopped in February after I wrote a suicide note and attempted to kill myself. I've been in remission, but my sisters been angrier with me than usual and I burned this time. I took a hot glue gun and laid it down until it didn't hurt. I've done that three times so that both hands look the same. I've been clean five days but I don't know how to ask for help.