How to bounce back

I came across this great article last week. How to stop a bad moment from destorying your whole day

We often let small negative expierences or inconveniences derail us from staying on the right track. It is so easy to think that "murphys law" will take over your whole day, just because one bad thing happens. Here are some great ways to bounce back when you feel like its going to tumbel down:

1. Observe your emotions.

After a negative event, know that you will be primed to feel and perceive information as negative, Klapow said. Thats why its crucial to develop a response technique that doesnt perpetuate those feelings.

First, acknowledge your emotions. Its OK to say, ‘Im angry, hurt, scared, frustrated, he said. Then, instead of dismissing your emotions or letting them consume you, try to take an observational approach. Get curious about why you are feeling this way. Talk yourself through the experience, he suggested, and ask yourself what you learned.

2. Remind yourself that you might be interpreting the situation incorrectly.

Simon Rego, the chief psychologist at Montefiore Medical Center at the Albert Einstein College of Medicine in New York, said everyone has a tendency to distort neutral situations into negative experiences. This is a kind of cognitive distortion, in which your mind convinces you of something that may not be true, and and it can reinforce your negative thoughts in the process.

For example, instead of asking your boss why you were taken off that big account, you might jump to the conclusion that its because youre incompetent. Rego said other common examples of cognitive distortion include overgeneralization, thinking in black and white terms, mind-reading, minimization, personalization and fortune-telling.

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Keep in mind that its not wrong to think negatively, he said — it can even be appropriate — but its important to examine your behavior to understand why youre thinking the way you are. Once were aware of our tendencies, he said, we can learn skills to help us recalibrate to perceive situations more rationally or objectively.

The first step is acknowledging that you may view certain situations problematically, he said. From there, you can evaluate your thought patterns and start to generate alternatives to the stories you tell yourself. What else could it be? What would I say to a friend? What is the best-case scenario? said Rego. These questions can get you out of being locked into a view.

And the more you practice putting yourself on trial, he added, the quicker you can course-correct in the future.

3. Concentrate on the facts.

When you feel overwhelmed, this simple exercise can put things into perspective. Fold a piece of paper, then write down all the facts of the situation — the things you know for sure — on the left side, Zakeri said. On the right side, write down all your worries, assumptions and fears, then direct your attention back to the facts.

Similar to checking your cognitive distortions, this practice can help you view the situation from a place of logic instead of pure emotion. Take control back from the experience rather than it controlling you and your day, she said.

4. Create a positivity practice.

Getting more control over your emotional responses is as much about cultivating positivity as it is diffusing negativity. Klapow recommended taking a few minutes each night to write down three things that went well during your day, no matter how small. Go an extra step and write down why you think those things went well — for example, Klapow said, maybe you got a promotion because you have been working hard.

The trick, he said, is to force yourself to think positively at least once every day. This will help shift your baseline pessimism slowly over time. It is called learned optimism, he added.

5. Get out of your head.

Sometimes the best way to get over a negative experience is to switch gears. Dive into a work task, turn to a creative outlet, go for a run, call a friend to check in or offer to help a co-worker or loved one with a project. Engaging in an enjoyable activity or shifting your focus to others can help diminish your feelings of negativity and put the situation into perspective.

6. Finally, check in with yourself.

Everyone falls prey to negativity sometimes, but its important to examine yourself to make sure youre not dealing with a bigger issue. If youre experiencing emotional distress at a high frequency or intensity, Rego said, if its causing a disability or impairment in your social or occupational or family functioning or if its so intense, its stopping you from living a full life, you may need to reach out to a mental health professional.