At your pace

Hey, like some of you I am a college student. I study Spanish, but I'm gonna take a test by the end of the semester to see if I can pass to English. I just love English so much... I have to do it.

I have 5 classes. One per day. 2 of them I won't be using in English, so I am not going (by the time, I can no longer just drop them, which doesn't mean I can't miss them. I doesn't matter.

So I am focusing on the 3 that can be used in the new course.

I was having a lot of trouble going to class, honestly. I was having panic attacks and I'd leave class early every time. My grandma started to give me 20 bucks only to go to the uni, but now it doesn't matter to me anymore. I rather have my sanity than have money.

I'm going with my flow. I missed so many classes I got lost in Latin Language Study. It is required in English course, so I hired a tutor, someone who is far in the course and knows Latin very well.

I had the class today and I understood everything. I got everything very fast. I'm gonna have another one and then I'll be done with tutoring. BUT this tutor also teaches French, and well... I love to speak languages, so I hired him for that, just for fun.

Not only I had tutoring today, I read an entire chapter of Linguistic Theory and made a summary, an abstract of it. I made it colorful and organised and shared with my colleagues.

I am proud of myself for a few reasons:

1. I didn't give up on Latin just because I was behind.

2. I managed to study and make an abstract.

3. I decided what I want to do.

4. I followed my heart, my pace and preserved my sanity.

5. I realized that pushing myself that hard, having bipolar and borderline, was only making me sicker. I pulled the brake.

6. I went beyond my limits, but didn't push that hard. At the end of the day, you don't have to have things perfect. You just have to get them done.