Alcohol is my self medication
I have been drinking since I was 17. I had gotten my first DUI at 19. I have horrible anxiety, depression and abandonment issues and when I can't calm myself down, I have always just got booze. The problem with that is I never know when to stop. I could drink for 10 hours straight. For example, I went through a horrible break up and was on a 3 day binge because I couldn't stop shaking and needed to numb the blackhole in my stomach. I didn't know how to cope with what was going on in my personal life, and actually got caught being drunk at work. Resulting in losing my job. I am so ashamed about it. I can say right now I haven't drank in 2 days, nor feel the need too. But I'm just sick and tired of myself. I say things I don't mean, and do stupid things. How does one learn how to drink 3 drinks and be done? Or not drink at all? I am also at the age right now where all my friends want to go out, that's how they hang out. I feel so alone 😔
@calmMoon7189 Hello Moon, welcome to the community. We are happy to have you here with us, and I really appreciate you opening up to us and reaching out for support; that takes so much courage. I am so sorry to hear about your struggles. You show great self awareness especially on why you are so relient on drinking. I can't answer your question; addiction impacts each person individually. However, there is always a chance of recovery. How are you coping lately? What efforts have you so far made in being less dependent on drinking?
We are here for you! If you have any concerns or questions, let us know. Feel free to also check out our resource forum if you haven't already. Resources for Addiction
Best wishes, and feel free to let us know how you are doing whenever you'd like. :)
@calmMoon7189 You sound like my husband, except he is 42 and will probably die soon from cirrohsis of his liver or he also has acid reflux, so maybe cancer in his esophagus. Worst part is, he doesn't even care. He drinks Miller Lite like water everyday. You are still young? Stop drinking. Now. There is so much more to life than getting drunk everyday. It's fun here and there on the weekends w/friends. What motivation do you need? What inspiration? My husband complains a lot about his past when he's drunk. All the mistakes he made. You don't deserve to be like that. Focus on the future and make a better life for yourself.
That must be heartbreaking to watch. How do you care for yourself since he wont get help? Do you go to Alanon? @TransAm85
@SweetTortoise I've tried going to AlAnon w/my mother, but it was hard to get there on time b/c my husband and I have an auto shop. He's basically a high functioning alcoholic. A lot of men have insecurities and regrets they won't face, so getting drunk is supposed to take it all away. Many addicts are also very smart, but they only see their faults unfortunately. Frued used cocaine, Steve Jobs and Bill Gates did LSD, and Einstein did meth, LSD and cocaine! The difference between a man and woman is pride and emotions. If we can ever find a bridge for that, maybe couples and families would be more civilized. I stay with my husband because I love him, but I am also very co dependent unfortunately. :( That I need to find a solution to!
@calmMoon7189
You have started way younger than me and for the wrong reasons. I was about to ask you why but the obvious answer is there...there was a gap in in your life and alcohol took that place. I'm not shrink, some day like me maybe we will find what these gaps were...I am sorry you were hit so young by this...😔😔😔
Neuroscience shows that alcohol, nicotine, heroine, cocaine, ect are highly addictive substances that anyone can become addicted to at any point in their lives if using them. Its like a switch turns in the brain. Alcohol does a number on the brain and its a deppressant. No one needs it for a good time. Society teaches the opposite bc alcohol is big business. I hope you are doing better now, not sure from your post. Sending light your way. @lightPeach1248
@SweetTortoise
You are wise...if you want me to be a submissive one you won. Churchill, Attila, Alexander the great, a great few others were a bit alcoholic. Nothing is simple dear Tortoise, never simple...
Sending a hug @lightPeach1248
I'm not a listener, but I certainly am an alcoholic.
Hi CalmMoon !!! Hope you are well now. Drinking in excess in routine is 100% dangerous for health. It's always wise to check with your doctor — she should be able to help you decide whether it is best for you to cut back or to abstain. People who are dependent on alcohol, or have other medical or mental health problems, should stop drinking completely. If your doctor suggests that you curb your drinking, then the following steps may be helpful.
Set a drinking goal for yourself
Don't keep alcohol in your house anytime
Drink slowly
Choose alcohol-free days in a week
Keep yourself busy in work
And finally be persistent
@calmMoon7189 I think this is very common in people who suffer from GAD and Panic Disorder. I have both and used alcohol to medicate. It made it worse in the long run in many ways. For 3 weeks now I have been in a constant anxiety attack panic episode. I haven't drank since then and don't want to. This has been the worst feeling and time ever in my life. It has been so hard and I have been anxious since I was a child but I know alcohol has made this much much worse. I feel like things are looking up and my brain is learning to cope with stressfull situations without alcohol and I have a differnt view on life. More motivation I'm excited to get better to actually have fun without drinking. I'm not saying this is going to happen to you but I hope my story might help you think differently about drinking to medicate. You are not alone. And you can have fun without drinking and find friends who don't drink. Think of your mental health first and everything else will fall into place.
Self aware ness is the best and you are aware about your health condition. This is the great sign that we truly admire.
When you other friends are hanging out, why don't you join a Yoga, meditation class? Because it won't harm you rather it will build your inner strength, make you busy, will make your health strong.
Did you ever check your health condition as you are drinking from a small age. It can damage your liver. You are on the way of sober as you can stay without drinking alcohol. Wish you a healthy life.
