Why do i miss him and drugs

I can't seem to shake him and with this comes the drugs.....a horrible life i wound up in, no short of a nightmare, yet i find myself longing......

He is in gaol now. I guess things have a way of happening but I hate what's happened for him; despite it being what society says is deserved.

I broke free from him and drugs...slowly became all at once as with him taken it became inevitable. I was drawn back in though.....not to drugs, without him i actually can't inject self nor would I go through it with anyone else.

I know his way, his lies and how he plays and uses me yet I can't let go.