Traumatic Experiences Community Daily Check-In Sunday May 20th 2018
Good Morning alle. It has been raining here for what seems like forever. Rain can lower our spirits (not you Rain, but the weather lol). Rain makes us wet, cold, and miserable. It keeps us indoors, and brings in mud and dirt when we go out. Rain can stop our plans for a fun and beautiful adventure, and it can put a hold on tasks and projects much in need ofour attention. Humans of alle the animals, in general hate being rained on though most other animals really could care less. When I think about it humans can stand in a shower for hours and feel great and relaxed but we hate being rained on. Thinking on that, I feel it's because it's something we can't control. But there is another side of rain too. On a hot day rain cools us and the world around us. Rain makes the trees, plants, and grass grow. Rain refreshes the earth and leaves puddles for animals to drink from. Rain gives us alle life just as the sun does. Trauma can be like rain. Cold, intrusive, and out of our control, yet bring about new ways of understanding, and like refreshing the trees and helping them grow, the rain of trauma can also reshape us when we look at it proper. Sure theres some mud, but many new and beautiful things grow too. I think perhaps Led Zeppelin said it best, "Unto us alle a little rain must fall". How do you see it? Do you see only the cold wet and muddy, or can you see alle the life around you being refreshed?
Just how my thoughts are this morning I guess. How are you alle doing today? What is on your mind? Please do share, this is your place and it is safe here. 
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@Raveninthelabrynth
Hi,
I'm not feeling that good today. I had a hard and strange week. Lot's of work for uni, the last class of a course I really liked, some arguing with my parents and my cousin and the shutdown of the theatre group I took part in for years, which turned out to actually be a restart for a group, whatever.
Yesterday I went to a Birthday-party and we stayed awake until 4 o'clock (which is a bad idea, I know) and I already woke up at 7 again. So probably I'm just tired and That's why everything feels so heavy and every problem that important. Because most of this stuff isn't such a great deal, right? And I don't even have to deal with it right now...
I don't know. I just wish I could stop thinking for a while. I'm tried. I want to sleep. But I have to take care of my siblings right now so I'll have to wait for a bit until I can finally go to bed. Thank God they are rather quiet today.
@sincerePark336 Hej Park, sorry to hear of your woes, it goes like this sometimes. Glad your siblings are treating you fair today, hang in there hon, the day will end and tomorrow is a new day.
I spent a while crying last night, and Ive been crying all morning. Someone I thought of as one of my best friends wont talk to me and I genuinely dont understand why. I dont know what I did, and she wont talk to me for me to find out. I tried to find out earlier but she just got mad at me and stopped talking again. She said some really mean things last night, and this morning wasnt much better. So Im just really hurt and really confused right now because I dont understand what happened. I feel like I lost someone I thought I could trust, and that makes it hurt even more because I really dont trust people.
@BeeLeigh Hi Bee, I'm so sorry you're going through this, I can't really offer much but these doggies wouldn't mind you joining them for a cuddle 
I shouldnt have said anything. I came here in an effort to not isolate, which is exactly what I want to do, but I shouldnt have said anything. I really need a friend right now. I really need someone to come sit with me. I really need someone to be here for me, but nothing happening with me is ever considered bad enough. Im always overlooked and pushed aside and everything builds until its just too much for me to deal with. And then I break. I dont want to be needy but I am right now. I need someone to be here for me but theres no one. I feel so isolated even though I intentionally didnt isolate this time despite how badly I wanted to. I shouldnt have said anything. I shouldnt have bothered any of you. Im sorry. Ill go away.
@BeeLeigh I often find myself apologising to my friends when I share how I'm feeling because I feel like a burden to them, like I shouldn't be bothering them with things like that. But this is a place for people to share. It's the best thing I've found. This is a place where you don't need to apologise. We are all here to support each other.
Hi Raven, it's been sunny all week here and I may be part vampire, so I wouldn't mind you sending a little rain my way :P
I'm not sure that trauma helps us grow, it gives us a different understanding of the world but I feel that it is too extreme, there is too much hurt. A little sadness along with good times can help us grow, too much and I think maybe we drown.
This week has been stressful for me, I have been given a new medicine to take when I have panic attacks, which the doctor and my partner say I have been having, but I don't know, last year a social worker told me that what I experience is not panic attacks, and that I am exaggerating. I know that really I should listen to the doctor, but it's hard.
Love and hugs
@FloweringBunny Bunny, you can have alle the rain you wish, I hope you like it cause m sending it lol.
Sorry for your confusion between Dr and Therapist. I cand give any advise on this matter, but I hope it works out for you.
I actually find the rain quite soothing. However, I've been really off recently. I continue to obsess over how my father "ruined" me with his abuse. I just wonder if it's true, and if I'll ever make a more complete recovery...
Will I be stuck like this my entire life?
@Behindhazeleyes We can't ever change what has been done, however we can find blance with ourselves and our particulars.
Keep at the hard work my friend balance will come
@Raveninthelabrynth I understand that Trauma is a lifelong thing, but I can't function. At all.
@Behindhazeleyes Gotta keep working at it. It's not instant nor easy, but have some faith in yourself. We are not the sum of our trauma
No rain here; it's very warm and sunny. I spent last week away with work and it was very sunny there as well and I had forgotten how much spending time out in the sunshine can improve my mood. I feel healthier and I'm sleeping better and even have the motivation to do some meal prep for the week ahead so here's to eating better as well.
That said I'm dealing with some difficult things right now. There's a girl I work with who has had similar trauma to me in the last few years. She has taken to sending me messages when she is in a bad place which is often late at night and I worry about her a lot. She doesn't know that we share experiences because I don't want her to feel that she might upset me with the things she needs to talk about, but I'm concerned I'm not totally objective and that that means I'm not helping her in the way she should be helped.
I think you're right that trauma can make us grow. I know that the things that have happened to me have made me a more compassionate person. They have made me more sensitive as well and that can sometimes be a bad thing. I struggle in some social settings and I was reminded of that this week when I went out with friends to a bar, something I wouldn't normally do. The nice thing about rain is that when it is gone it has washed other things clean. I don't think life is like that. We are always shaped by our experiences, positive and negative. This friend of mine talks about wanting to be 'normal' again and I don't know how to kindly tell her that her 'normal' will probably be different now, not because she can't move on, because I think she can, but because her world is a different place because of the things she has experienced. We don't get 'washed clean.' We grow and we develop and we get stronger because the load we have to carry is greater.
@Roslyn992 Well spoken about the rain.
It's cool you have this friend with common woe. Have you considered leading her here to the cup for additional support?
Hey hey hey it's that lazy person again! (I'm talking about myself) Hope everyone's doing fantastic. 
The rain in our lives is a good time to think and reflect. Which I should be doing now. Or tomorrow, since it's a holiday. And try not to end up watching TV instead again.
Anybody got a long weekend too? Any special plans?
@Torremp Hej Tor soulds like you have some decent plans, Not sure about the weekend myself but I hope it will be a relaxing one.
Good to see you today
@Raveninthelabrynth I have always seen rain as a cold and miserable thing even though we need it in our life. Sometimes though I find it really relaxing. Anyway, my day is pretty good.
@FangsInsanity Well I'm a bit tired of this rain as it's interfering with my move, but yes I too can dig it.
Glad to hear your day is going well
@Raveninthelabrynth haha funny joke there Raven. Its very true about Rain, theres positives and negatives. It can make us cold and wet through but in a land that is dry and hasnt seen a drop of rain in months it can be a welcome relief. As I was reading your post it reminded me too of how I used to sit on a window ledge as a child, watching the raindrops outside and I used to think those were all the tears I was unable to cry. And then of course, after the rain, you have the rainbow. a symbol for me of hope. There is so much more to rain than the negatives we often associative with it.
@Rain45 Beautiful
