Frustrated/Confused

Hello, I have never been diagnosed which is the first thing I wanted to share. My therapist was going to start talking and then she unexpectedly got a job somewhere else. I started having times where I felt like I was there but I couldn't control what I was doing, then I had larger gaps. My Fiance is super supportive, he would ask questions and I realized there are times in my life I don't remember at all. It's frustrating and I have put a lot of pressure on myself because I have always thought I knew who I was. Now that I know that I don't know anything and I know there's others who come out and my fiance has met them I just feel like I need to know EVERYTHING. I don't care how messed up some of the stuff is. I don't know what to do. I'm just so sad and angry.