A great deal of trauma
TW for just about everything. Free-form vent.
I’m in a lot of pain emotionally and some physically. I’m beyond *** off at everything that has happened in my life for the past 40+ years. I’m not usually the type to gripe and complain. I just deal with it.
Well, I can’t anymore. I have breast cancer for the second time in 5 years. I ended up in the hospital for an unrelated medical issue a few months ago. I’ve had painful procedures. One was even traumatizing.
I was bullied mercilessly at school, abused at home as a child, lost friends and didn’t know why, lost jobs and didn’t know why, been in abusive relationships, had a complete mental breakdown 10 years ago, got breast cancer the first time, lost a family member to suicide, lost one of my medical insurances that I’m genuinely entitled to, got into a legal battle with my landlord because I dared to tell him about a fire hazard that the fire department agreed with, and to “thank” me, he tried to evict us!
I’m a disabled person because of my mental health, and I’m also neurodivergent. Right now, I feel like complete toast, mentally. I’m burnt out, *** off, heartbroken, and done with all of this crap, and I still have to go through it.
I want to scream.
To make things worse, I also have OCD and phobias that are getting triggered and worse because of my anxiety and all that I’m dealing with. I’m just so done.
It’s been too much, and at the risk of sounding like I’m feeling sorry for myself, it’s too much! Nobody should have to go through all this. Nobody!
@CoralGrief
Felling sorry for yourself, wow, what other way could you possibly feel!
What you've been through is too much for one person
Life can be so unjust.
I'm genuinely so sorry you experienced all of this.
I'm sorry you have breast cancer again.
I can't imagine how exhausting this is , I'm praying that you can get through this , one day at a time.
If prayers do not sit well with you, I'm sending you my best wishes for recovery 💜
I know what its like to lose someone to suicide, it's sudden, painful, so many unanswered questions, the grief haunts you, it's relentless, and yet, we still have to go on.
And there's so much stigma, when people are neurodivergent and can't work, yet it's something that should have no shame attached to it.
It must be tiring always having to advocate for yourself , for something everyone else takes for granted.
You are not alone here.
I wanted you to know, I hear you 💜💕
