Being healed, healthy and whole in a world full of people who are not.

@sigma41922 I understand. There are cruel people in this world. I was a slave for 18 years, I've seen evil. However I believe there are more good people than bad. We need to see the g ood in people. You will find we are surrounded by magic and beauty. Just gotta look hard enough

Oh boy I could say a whole lot of things but here's one

Although she didn't do it on purpose, my mom used to be on Valium, which is one of the worst drugs to get off of. The summer where she tried to get off it was horrible, especially because that's when I had my so-called glow up. Wat the drug made her do ranged from throwing bagels and tables at me, to try to jump from the upstairs deck, to strangling herself in front of me in the eyes. I would go to school extremely sad and angry, and ppl were like "why do you look so angry", and when I explained I was upset, they said how they've been through worse or has terrible trauma, which made me feel like "why am I being the escapegoat" I told a teacher I though I could trust, but it didn't help. My mom found out and she said I betrayed her, and that I didn't love her. Even recently I've been on my bed and she comes up to me saying how we're losers, bums, white trash, how she "failed" as a single mother, and other horrible things. Bear in mind all this is being dealt wit wit trauma from when I was a little kid bout my father, illness, financial stuff, alchohalism, and extreme bullying. So yea I've been sabatoged but this is wat I would say to help you

You gotta realize that in this life you are in your own world. Wat ppl try to do to you is not you. Although it is negative, as long as you stay yourself and don't lose yourself in the process, you will be alright. You may not be surrounded by good people, but you can try to surround yourself wit good things, like a hobby. Whether it's reading, writing, art, sports, video games, music etc as long as it's positive. Everything single person in the world has some demons, but whether great or small, it will only have a good effect on you. The greater your pain, the stronger you'll become. We live in a world nowadays where ppl are not healed, which only causes more destruction in our lives. However. If we do good things like I said, we can end this cycle of pain. I know this sounds goofy, but you have to trust me.

Wishing much love to you and know that you can always vent here if ya need. 🙏🙏

@sigma41922 When I found out that feeling my feelings was even possible, I wasn't at a point where I had full awareness of how much healing that I had left to do. Now healing is one of THE greatest goals.

I was very surprised, almost shocked, that so many people are not interested in healing. They just want to feel better by numbing out instead of addressing the root problem. Granted, numbing out is a temporarily relief that can put someone in a better place to heal. Many people don't seem to go forward from there...