Grieving too many losss
There are things I carry that don’t really fit into words anymore.
Loss has been a constant theme in my life people I loved, moments I can’t get back, versions of myself that didn’t survive what I went through. I function on the outside, but inside it’s often like I’m holding everything together with tired hands.
Some days I’m okay. Other days it feels like I’m remembering everything all at once.
I’m not here to be dramatic, and I’m not asking anyone to carry this for me. I just need a place where I can be honest without feeling like I have to shrink it down or make it sound easier than it is. Idk if you know how it feels to smile while you're grieving?!
@Samarahexisiting
Grief is no joke. I was in a war when I was younger and had a great deal of it. A couple years ago my step brother died on a motorcycle. Last year I lost my dog. Grief is very much a part of my daily experience.
The thing is that with love comes grief. We can't accept love into our lives without also accepting the grief that accompanies it. Further, the harder we love the harder we grieve. If you aren't grieving very hard over the loss of them, then you probably didn't love them very much either.
The best we can hope for is radical acceptance. It's the idea that as terrible as these things are, it's a part of our reality and our existence.
I'm sorry you're struggling with all of this so much. I promise you're not alone.
I just try to take the good with the bad. There is still more to life than grief. I try my best not to drown in it.
@Samarahexisiting i know how it feels to hide your huge sadness behind smiles
@Samarahexisiting
Sorry you are feeling so overwhelmed and tired 😫
If you don't mind me saying, the fact that you have grieved or grieving is a natural and even a good thing (at least for a period of time).
This might seem odd, but I have really never grieved!!! All my grandparents, parents, and some aunts and uncles have died. I don't remember ever shedding even a tear sadly.
What I have to the realization is that I must not have truly loved if I haven't grieved....long story and lots of abuse.
Hang in there, keep your chin up and find a professional if you think it can help you.