If you ask me
If you ask me how I feel- I'd say I'm fine..
But if you ask me how I really feel I'd say that.. when I was a child, there was a time when I was around five years old, I had to sleep in the hous alone. The person who gave birth to me drank and gambled. I would go to school with an empty stomach, with mismatched socks... I had to erase the pencil writings on the last pages of my notebook, because there was no space left for the new notes.. There was a time she would even lock me out of the house.
I had to work in an early age.. There are things that happened to me that I don't even want to put into words.
If you ask me how I really feel, I'd say that almost every person who I trusted has hurt me.. That I don't feel truly safe with anyone, that I shut people off.
But if you ask me casually, I'd smile and say I'm fine.
I'm truly doing my best every day.
It pains me that you've been through so much and still have the courage to press on.
It's easier to say I'm fine, not a lot of people are willing to hear the truth about how we really feel deep down.
I know that at least the one place to be candid and open without judgements is through writing. No-one needs to see it.
Sometimes I don't even comprehend all of it.
I hope you'll find things in life that matter and bring you happiness, it helps to focus on that, during tough times and here is a good place to mingle and vent and take part in the games/icebreakers :)
Yes.. I just had a trigger last night that's why I wrote that.. But I know that there are a lot of things to be grateful for. I don't hold it against anyone how they treated me, because some people can only show love in a limited capacity, and that the way they treat themselves can manifest unto others.
But there are other things to do and focus on.
Different minssets could be:
- The glass is half full..
-The glass is half empty
-The glass HAS water
-There IS a glass
-You CAN ADD water to the glass
-What else is there? (on the table?)
-Who owns the glass?
-I WILL drink it.