Im lucky to be alive today
My ex took me on a "romantic getaway camping trip" only to end up dragging me with his car in his attempt to abandon me in the middle of nowhere I knew at 4am. Then he had the gull to show up not long after I finally got back home. I had to get police all involved and leave his stuff on the curb for my own protection.
I don't see myself trusting anyone ever again.
Hi @brokenmess42.
Your ex is quite terrible. He really went out of his way to mistreat you. I am sorry you went through that..
I understand you not wanting to trust anybody else but know this, most people don't act that cruel..
You have my sympathies 🌟
My experience has shown me otherwise. That the seemingly nicest most caring people are the ones you have to watch out for. He wasn’t like that in the beginning. But there were plenty of red flags that I have seen so many times with previous "relationships", and I still look over them because I'm so lonely and desperate it hurts. But I have no real self worth, just plenty of self awareness. Lot of good it does me if my emotions override all logic. And only when I am in a relationship. When I am on my own, I do well for a while. Then the loneliness seeps in until it becomes too overwhelming to bare. I have no one. Can't make genuine connections with anyone, nor maintain small connections for long.
And all of this just makes me think on how it's my lack of self worth, the tendency to be overly accepting, sacrificially forgiving, constantly minimizing myself in order to win approval, and even my own habit of playing in to my own victim mentality and projecting that out to a "knight in shiny armor".
I recognize my own toxic behaviors and patterns from when in that relationship. And I can't trust myself to not keep making the same choices, repeating the same patterns. How i allow myself to be so easily lured in knowing how it's going to end and knowing it's my fault first because i allow it. I make the same choices. Awareness doesn't seem to be enough.
@brokenmess42
" That the seemingly nicest most caring people are the ones you have to watch out for".
Ha-ha, that is really-really true often :}Not alway of course, tere must be some certain conditions but anyway it's almost a rule :}
@brokenmess42
Excellent break down
@brokenmess42
That's terrible 😔💚
I'm glad you are safe now and away from someone so violent!
I'm just sorry you had to go through this!
Good to hear that you're alive
@brokenmess42 I thought my fiancé was gonna do something similar, but it turns out I have ptsd and substance issues so I ran to my mothers house. I feel so bad for even imagining her doing that to me, I’m sorry it actually happened to you. I wish people would just speak up rather than act irrational, my self and the person who left included.
Thank you everyone.
Im scared because he keeps posting things online revealing my full name and diagnosis and when I mentioned it to the cops they just called him to ask him. Well when they called me back they said I wasn't telling the whole story.
wait what! What the heck are you talking about? Apparently' according to what my ex told the officer, (a man who is considered violent. Has multiple restraining orders against him including children. And also has multiple serious mental illnesses i did not know about, all of which he is treating with drugs. Not the prescribed kind.) That the reason he put my personal and private medical information on a public forum was because I had his phone and was going through it messaging people. Which isn't remotely true. So I sent the officer pictures of the phone in the bag that I packed for him the day prior to all this. He posted the video that night hours after he picked up his stuff. I told the officer I didn't have his phone and the only person I've been messaging about this is my sister. And I have a right to message my sister. She's the one helping me through this. I don't have or know anyone else.
The cop is so stupid or maybe just confused and didn't know what the heck he was actually dealing with. He goes, I'll make you a deal. He says he'll take the video down if you stop messaging people.
At this point I am so frustrated I practically bite the officer's head off.
I said, i don't know how i can make this any clearer. I don't have his phone. I don't have access to his phone. I don't even have the password to his phone.
He goes, well that's not what he says.
So I flat out said, and you're just going to take his word for it. I have pictures of actual proof. And you're just going to take his word over my proof. I don't understand.
He goes, well I just tried to be mediator. But I can see that's not happening here.
I said, I don't know what there is to mediate. I have injuries and proof of those injuries. And he is harrassing me and putting out my personal information. I just want him to leave me the heck alone. Again the only person I have been talking to about all this is my sister. And yeah the day of the incident HE went on threads spreading lies about me. I merely responded with pictures to contradict what he was saying. He then made the post unavailable. And then I blocked him. I have not bothered him since. I have not reached out to him since I told him his stuff was ready yesterday. And I don't want to reach out to him. My energy is going in to protecting myself and my children from him.
Mind you I am loud and emotional at this point. But after saying all that I go quiet. Because finally I said the injustice of it all out loud.
The officer goes, is there anything else I can help you with.
😑 AI shows more concern than someone who is sworn to protect, I swear.