Uncovering Childhood Trauma
Hi,
For the past three years nearly, I have been dealing with long covid. It has been really debilitating in so many facets of my life. My body and mind do not work the same anymore. I have not been able to work, exercise, parent consistently the way I want to parent. I am struggling today.
In this journey, I have had to be in bed a lot, sitting still. And not do all the things used to help me feel good. Very little dopamine kicks. In sitting still, not eating what I want etc, not exercising, not working, not drinking or smoking, I have realized I carry a lot of pain from childhood. It is kicking my *** as I uncover these things and see how they have affected me, now in my mid forties.
Does anyone have any advice? When I could no longer self soothe because of the illness, these things with my dad especially keep coming up. I am trying to deal with them, some days have been better than others. I forgive him, his dad was really bad, I am just mad at what my life has become and I am really starting to blame him for that. It is not a good feeling, any help would be so appreciated.
@Billstheteam awww sweetie I'm so sorry your struggling so badly with all this 🙁 bad people made me disabled I'm in a wheelchair now with limited movement🙁 I know that's not the same as your condition, but I know how incredibly hard it is to not be able to do what you want to and how badly it effects your mental health🙁 so what helped me was to focus on what I'm still able to do rather than the things I can't do. I found joy in new hobbies and the little things in life that made me smile 💖 I really hope you find something that still brings you happiness 💖 gives you a giant tiny hug 💗
Thanks so much for writing, I really appreciate it
I don't have much advice, besides this: be patient with yourself, give yourself some grace. You're going through a major life adjustment, with your health being affected. It's very easy to wallow, and have self-pity, when we aren't feeling our best. That's not to say you don't need to address issues from your childhood, but remember to forgive yourself as well.
Thank you so much for writing
