What if I’m wrong?

so I’ve been through traumas from child abuce to adulthood abuce from my mother and relationships I’m now well into adulthood and recently went through a huge trauma after trauma episode and I’m trying to heal from this I’ve moved in with a male that has been abused himself and been told he is a risk but I’ve seen evidence he is not a risk my mother my abuser had manipulated local authorities into thinking I’m this horrible person and the truth came out that I wasn’t this person and I was telling the truth and now my eldest teen is causing trauma in the household and it is triggering both me my partner and my youngest child, after moving away from the trauma I’m not coping very well and now it’s causing friction between me and my partner he thinks it’s my fault that the trauma is happening but I was in a difficult situation and trying to make him understand this but because I’m not coping well right now it looks like what everyone is saying is right but I don’t beleive it is I know it’s not right but now I’m second guessing myself and I don’t know what to do anymore I’ve never had propper help and I need it but I know getting help just will be used against me so therefore I feel I have no support