Help

Hello, I really see myself in your posts. I'm the child of a drug addict and an alcoholic, as if it wasn't enough, I ended up being molested by someone close to the family for many years. Did therapy in my twenties. Came out slowly. started to really accept myself late thirties. Know pretty well the all process of my self-destructive behavior but really don't know how to stop it. Terrible relations. Always end up being mistreated or rejected. I feel desperate. I'm terrified I'll end up alone or that the next relationship will be exactly the same as the previous ones. Can't handle the pain anymore and can't seem to let go.