I recognize the trigger and cause but how do I fix it

So I grew up with my parents withholding physical affection and verbal affection and it made me so insecure about my actions and really messed up my independence, confidence etc.

both of my parents passed away the last 2 years, and I’m building my self up after that. I live with my wonderful partner, and they are so supportive and reassuring.

Today my partner was going into a state of mania (they are bipolar) and one part of that is that they need time alone and less contact physically.

I know I didn’t do anything wrong and I am still very loved but they just went to bed and I feel touch starved, even though they still made an effort of hugging me and forehead kisses a few times today. I started crying and hyperventilating because my anxiety started saying “you did something to upset him, you shouldn’t have taken time in the bath because now he’s gone and you lost time with him”

I know why I feel this way, I can tell myself it’s illogical because he has verbally and physically reassured me that it’s not about me, but I still start crying.

Where do I go from here? How do I heal?