I was abused by a sociopath
Hello everyone! I'm kind of new here but I realized one day I should probably join the trauma support
Honestly compared to a lot of people my story seems kind of small so it makes me feel bad sharing it but I need to get it off my chest.
Because of this I have had depression, paranoia, anxiety, and trust issues for 4+ years.
So a few years ago I met someone who seemed really nice. At first she was really nice to me and seemed to want to be close friends. We gave each other stuff, played together, Sat together at school.. All was well for a few months.
But then I noticed something off about her. She got REALLY mad at the smallest things, was really manipulative and toxic, and just seemed to be squeezing everything from me, from my stuff to my life. By the time I realized she was not what she seemed, I had already felt extremely depressed and had told her that. As I grew more wary around her and said no more often she grew worse and used my depression against me. Words cannot even begin to describe the pain she caused me.
Worst of all, the teachers refused to believe me. She was so manipulative that nobody thought she was lying and she acted like it was all her fault. For three years I was stuck in an infinite loop of hurt, worry, cry, hurt, worry, cry. She refused to let me move on. By day she hurt me emotionally and made me regret everything. At night I lay there, dreading the next day and worrying about what she would do next. It only stopped because she went to a different school this year.
As a result, I was severely depressed and suicidal, I had frequent anxiety attacks, I was extremely paranoid and I had trust issues. To this day I have never trusted anyone since. I have flashbacks to what she's done frequently and I have trouble holding people's hand (she always would hold my hand and cling on so that I had to listen to her or come with her)
She hurt me a lot more than what I described here, but it's too hard to put the pain into words. She always found a way to twist your words and exploit your weaknesses and bend and break your will ... I felt like a tool.
Like I said, I see all the other's stories and I feel bad sharing mine... I feel like theirs is more important so sorry if this isn't a big deal... I've always been scared to tell anyone.
Thanks for listening
@spiritwolf75
Hey, don't judge your own trauma against others :) :) What is traumatic to you will be different from what is traumatic to someone else, we all have different life experiances and different scales. If it hurt, then it hurt and noone can say your hurt isn't valid <3.
Narcisists and sociopathic type people are frankly terrifying. I've been in contact with a few, and been messed over by atleast one. I can readliy imagine the kind of torture she put you through. Some people have a way with words, and threats and before you know it your too scared to do anything else. These people know how to find your biggest fears, worries and weaknesses and exploit them mercilessly. All the while making you feel like you owe them something for some reason. That they are the one doing the favour being your friend. Its a really vicious circle and I am glad you are out of it now.
Welcome to the community, and thanks for being brave enough to share your story :) I hope you manage to slowly find some peace :)
Sorry you went through that but I want you to know not all sociopaths are like that some are trying to better them selves. I know I am. I made a rule where when I date someone I tell them I am a sociopath and I always try and tell the truth. It’s hard sometimes and it end with lots of failed relationships but the one I am in now and it’s great. I don’t manipulate her or anything like that. Not going to lie I used to do that but everyone does bad things. Whatever you do don’t let this low functioning sociopath ruin your life you can meet someone great. Hopefully someone more normal. Good luck with the rest of your life.
