Traumatic Experiences - Bullying
Has anyone here been through traumatic experiences involving bullying? How have these incidents caused you to feel?
I know it is not easy, as I have been through these events, myself. They can cause distress, painful feelings, hurt and discomfort if people try to mistreat you, bring you down, and continually cause you harm. You are not alone. Many people around the world, have been through this negative experience.
Know that you didn't deserve any harassing words or actions to happen to you. They have nothing to do with you. They were initiated as a choice, on the part of the bullies. Nobody deserves maltreatment for any reason.
I don't think it is a traumatic experience. I was bullied and teased back in the early 90's b/c I was a chubby kid. Yes it hurt my feelings, but back then, we were taught to tough it out and stand up for ourselves. That's how a kid is supposed to grow up. Not treated like a baby, diagnosed w/anxiety or depression b/c of being bullied and then put on medication lol. Life is not easy, there's bullies in every aspect of life, whether it be kids when you're growing up or maybe you'll get a jerk for a boss when you grow up! But we have to be strong and confident. Bullies are just insecure people that take out their anger on other people that they assume won't do anything.
@TransAm85
How would you feel if you told someone you were traumitized by something and they told you they also experienced it but walked it off because it's not a big deal?
@intelligentLove41 I know that times have changed, but I just don't think being bullied should be considered a traumatic experience. I have been bullied in my youth and yes, it has effected me still to this day. I will probably never get over the cruel things those kids said to me b/c I still am self conscious about certain things, even though I have lost so much weight and I do not look the same. Have you heard about the sub conscious? A person may not think about it everyday, but it will always be in the back of our minds, the things we try to forget. So, yes, I understand, but at the same time, I just think kids need to stand up for themselves more instead of just relying on medication and therapy for being bullied.
@TransAm85
I will agree that some level of bullying is sadly normal and not traumatic in the long run, but sometimes people can be really really nasty, and when that is inflicted on you ever day for years, or just one really bad experiance, I think that is trumatic.
@Lilibuth12 I will never forget what the kids said to me. I am still self conscious to this day about the things they said, even though I lost weight and look totally different, it still stays w/me. I just don't think kids need to be put on drugs and go to therapy b/c of being bullied.. I don't agree w/that. Like I said, bullies have issues also and that's why they tease other people.
@TransAm85
I agree, being put on medication is most likely not helpful, but again it depends on the situation. However I will disagree regarding therapy. I think therapy can really help someones confidence and when you have been bullied sometimes you need to work out how you feel about yourself and seperate it from what other people told you. Of course it shouldn't be forced on you or anything!
Hey Isabelle,
Yer I one of my traumatic experiances is bullying. I was bullied the whole way through school, I moved half way through primary school (UK) and I was used to playing football etc. at my previous school. I got ostracized for wanting to talk to boys and I ended up resorting to violence. I used to get restricted to specific areas of the play ground for violence and it just made me get bullied more. Secondary school wasn't much better. I had one friend who ignored me for 8months at a time, but my only other friends talked with her so she was around me all the time, just would look right through me. It was horrible. People would steal my stuff and send round pictures of me laughing.
Bullying just makes you feel really isolated and alone, its really sad that people who are struggling already get bullied for being different.
Sorry that anyone else has gone through this, its horrible and when you are most vunerable can make you feel completely alone.
@IsabelleJ
I was never bullied until I started volunteering here. It's horrible. I'm sorry you had to go through it.
@intelligentLove41
Oh my goodness! I'm so happy to see you here! *huge hugs* I'm so sorry about all you've faced here, I'm glad you decided to stay though. 💙
I was bullied for a few years and have endured physical harm. My worst experience was when someone grabbed a large rock/small Boulder and threw it at my head and I bleed a lot while they ran and laughed at me with other mean kids till i was rushed away. Even so and with my other experiences, I'm greatful and since I've been helping bullied victims through a school program I made with some counselors and spreading anti-bully awareness.
@SimplySara
Thank you for sharing your experience. That must've been difficult for you to go through.
My daughters have gone through very traumatic bullying and, sadly, a desensitized society can make that harder for victims to speak up when they're bullied.
Over time, how did you learn to better cope with those experiences?
@BradyChay2310 During those few years my coping mechanism was writing. I would always carry a pencil and search for any scrap of paper I could and to have that was the best escape for me. I was able to let out my true thoughts and feels I had bottled up because back then I was a doormat. When I would make various trips to school administration to get help but never did, writing soothed my frustration and sadness. It had also helped me when i was done being bullied mean by after being bullied for the day because all the events were fresh in my mind and writing it all play-by-play it was helpful for me to remember what happened to report it. My other mechanisms that helped along the way we're reading and listening to music as a way of escape and comfort : )
@SimplySara
Writing sure does help me. <3 That's great that you found a way to deal/cope during that time. It's sad to hear you were ignored, though.
One of my daughters do the same thing (write), but (I agree) technology can get in the way of that some days.
Thank you for the concern and encouraging post. :)
@BradyChay2310 I hope your daughters are ok and apologize for what they are going through. Today's youth being as technology advanced as they are is very scary and makes the bullying process much more barbaric.
I'm very sorry to hear you guys have also experienced bullying incidents. I hope that we can all heal effectively from these. Many people around the world are going through this negative experience, and everyday. No-one should feel they are alone in this