middle ground

i feel like im in this weird middle ground where im not at the point where i can relate with a lot of you but enough has happened so that whenever i ‘come out to my friends about all of it they are shOok to say the least

when i was ~under 8 my dad would only ever yell at my mom+occasionally throw a mug but as me and my sis got older and my sis stood up to him every once and a while he would target her too, over the years he crafted this story of my mom mindwashing the both of us to hate him which he still holds on to. he used to try to get me on his side telling me how they were such pigs (that was his thing as his manic episodes were often about cleaning) around middle school he began making comments about my weight which was a sensitive subject as i had had a stomach disease and took steroids for it which made me a bit chubby in elementary (he claims he never did this) now in high school things went off the rails, at this point me and my sister would have to run out of the house for the day at least twice a month and my mom would get a hotel room or we would stay with our aunt overnight maybe every other month. now i just graduated hs and we moved out finally. whenever i describe the whole thing to people they are really surprised and concerned but i still sometimes feel not enough has happened to me to be considered even emotional abuse even w/ all the times ive been scared i was going to die

anyway i just want people who have a story similar to mine to know you are valid