Elderly ptsd

My grandparents have so many health issues and Monday morning my grandma had a heart attack in front of me which was very scary and horrifying as 911 had me on hold for 15 minutes.. my grandma has raised me my entire life and i want to cry but i feel like she wouldn’t want me to even though it’s a normal human reaction. I’m trying to be so strong as my grandpa is 81 he’ll be 82 in January. But it’s so much weight and I’m just so exhausted.