Forgiving People?
I'm so sick and tired of hearing how I should forgive the people who caused my PTSD and my subsequent re-victimization.
@walkswithwolves
You do not need to re-connect, forgive, or even talk with anyone who has left you with scars? There is nothing wrong with putting you, your safety and comfort above everyone else. Period.
Anyone who says otherwise probably don't know what it feels like.
It's just getting super frustrating. And certainly not helping my healing to have people telling me crap like that. Like I'M the one doing something wrong.
I get where you're coming from. I forgave the person who hurt me NOT for him BUT for myself. Bc I felt like I COULDNT completely heal. BUT I never met up with them or anything. Nope. They probably have no idea I've forgiven them. I just in my hurt forgave that person and let go. And I kid you not. I felt a huge wave taken off. BUT I forgave after almost twenty years. Yep. It took that long but everyone is different. The way I see it, don't forgive for them BUT FOR YOU. bc have all that negative emotion kinda corrodes the soul with time. And that's not healthy or no way to live. If you're ever ready do it for yourself never for anyone else. Hugs.
@LPyMP
Yeah, no. F that noise too. Tired of hearing people feed me those lines too. That I should "forgive them for me." Uhh, no. I don't have to do anything. How is letting them off the hook for what they did making ME feel better? It doesn't.
If it helps you, that's fine. I'm glad. Really, I am. But don't be "that person." Don't tell people they should forgive their source of pain for any reason. Just don't. It's not your place, frankly.
@walkswithwolves
I apologize deeply. You are right it is not my place. Everyone has to decide what is best for them. I meant no offense and it was not my intention to upset you in any way. I apologize if I have.
@walkswithwolves
I agree with this so gotdamned HARD. You got it, you're absolutely right.. EFFFFF THAT NOISE!
Im happy to see Im not the only one who feels that way. I wont forgive what I can't forget, is my personal saying. If I dont deserve the bs, than why do/es the culprit(s) deserve any of my consideration. They shouldve thought about the deeds that were unjustly imposed, "before doing the does!"
You made my night. Thank you.
Amazing and totally agree!
Forgiveness is a beautiful thing and has to have an element of compassion. To deserve the compassion, people have to show it to being with.
People who go out causing such atrocities that affect us in such ways to leave us so scarred don't have that compassion to deserve the forgivess.
Is so sad that it is a human trait that being damaged or lost in people :(
Love to all you beautiful people
@walkswithwolves
I totally get where you're coming from. I've forgiven one of mine 5 times and still end up at square one. I made it very clear that forgiveness does not mean forgetting and I just want to move on and live my life without them in my life to drag me back into the past.