Hi, does it sound like trauma?
I had a pretty traumatic childhood - I saw my mum try and kill herself, I've seen my dad get so smashed due to pills he wasn't supposed to drink on that he fell through our stairs banister and smashed his ribs, I've been taken to a refuge and my mum has been in rehab, and a bunch of other crap.
I've never been diagnosed with post traumatic stress disorder but I also detest talking to doctors and counsellors and don't ever really tell them the full story. I don't have flash backs thankfully, but sometimes I can't not think about some of the stuff, and there's huge gaps in my memory - I know the stuff happened, but I don't actually remember it happening, if that makes sense. I remember being there and seeing it happen, but they're not smooth memories. I can't remember the order of anything that happened, and usually just guess based on something in the memory I do have - I think I remember mum trying to kill herself in high school because I remember one of the teachers wanting to talk to me, and I was scared they knew, but it was about something else.
Sometimes I feel down for no reason, I'm rubbish at keeping friendships and I'm often pretty confused about how I really feel. This might all be run of the mill depression, but if someone could just say 'it might be' or 'it probably isn't!' then maybe if I end up being ready for counselling one day, i'll know where to start!
Thanks guys
Hi I don't know much about a traumatic child hood, but i had to comment because I feel like a connected with this and just thought how sad I foster kids now so maybe that's why, I think you definitely have depression but at the same time why wouldn't you I would suggest really trying to deal with what's happened to you it's hard but we shelf things we don't wanna think about I do it it too! Like I think about something stressful that is out of my control and I stop myself and think oh I don't wanna think about that instead of dealing with it if that makes sense? Counselling would help but yes it's hard finding the right person I hope you do
Hello, first of all, I'm so sorry to hear that you experienced all of this *hugs*. It must have all been very tough for you. It is possible that you may have depression as symptoms do include feeling low for no reason. You may want to consider contacting a listener 1-1 for more information about depression and the symptoms included. Have a nice day! :)
@emix It sounds like things have been very tough for you, and witnessed things in your childhood I imagine no - one should have to witness never mind a child. I am sorry to hear this and that it has now caused you PSTD and also maybe symptoms of depression. Although it does sound like you are displaying symptoms of depression, no one here is qualified to diagnose. This would have to be done by a doctor.
However listeners are here for you 1-1, to listen to anything you like to talk about and be a shoulder to cry on.
Also these self help guides may be useful for you ---- https://www.7cups.com/depression-help-online/
- https://www.7cups.com/traumatic-experience-help/