It’s okay to come back
For a long time, I haven't been on this app, I thought that I was okay and I was finally healed and that was that, I was so wrong . To sum up what happened to me, I was rapped,sexually assaulted, and I would get physically abused by a senior and a junior, I was only 14 at the time, I'm now 17. The reason why it was so complex was because I didn't know what was happening to me, it took me a full two years to remember everything because my brain blocked it out majority of the bad stuff. I didn't know who to confide in, and people took that as a sign that I was the abuser, mind you the two of them were varsity football players so of course their going to protect them.
The reason why I'm back per say, is because I'm in a form of relapse. I got into a fight and what the other person said hurt and sent me down a spiral of all of my trauma again, the things that person said was exactly if not definitely, the exact words people and even my own family would tell me everyday to the point were I almost overdosed on pills. I'm back because I don't want to get to that point again and undo the amazing progress that I have made for the last three years.
It's okay to come back and get help when it's something you dealt with, it's okay, no one has ever gone through what we've gone through, I mean we have but in different levels, it's not all the same. There is no specific length in time you have to be over your trauma, you take your time, at your own pace. We got this.
Thanks for sharing what you’ve been through. I can’t even comprehend what you’ve dealt with.
thank you for being so brave
sending love your way💗
One thing I have learnt in life is that things that happened to us when we were younger affects us the more when we are old and the mistakes people make is that they think we cope with those things when we are old. Unless we know how to cope with something, there is no way we can defeat it. Listen baby girl, u need to know that at that age being rape was not ur fault at all. Am I saying if u are old it ur fault? No, but when we are young we don't know how to protect ourselves better. I will tho criticize u for leaving this forum or help bcz what happened to u will never be out of ur mind blv me. U will need support forever bcz the wound is there and everytime someone says even a small thing about it even unknowingly, the wound opens up. So baby girl, don't ever leave this platform, we are there for support even if we are far apart. U can get professional support as well if a need arises, this will help u forever. U need to know that you are now vulnerable and you are not like one who has not experienced your trauma, I'm saying this in best manner ever. So, plz rely on a professional help or this if u have to. U will b fyn.
I’m so proud of you for holding onto your healing and progress. When someone has been through as much as you, it can be difficult to let go of the suffering so you can hang on to all the progress you’ve made. It’s impossible to see while you are in the thick of an episode or relapse or even just a difficult time. It is hard to have hope after experiencing a violation so cruel. And yet here you are, reaching for your healthy tools. I’m so sorry those boys hurt you. May you find comfort, solace, restoration, and healing.
