Overwhelming Fear and hopelessness
I have these horrible bouts with extreme fear and complete hopelessness. I can feel it creep up into my core and it's so debilitating. I need someone to talk to but I don't have anyone I can call. What a complete "alone on planet earth" feeling. I guess I'm just going to leave the world someday feeling this way. I so badly want to relax and feel happy . This feeling has followed me since I was 2. It's been decades of pushing it down but I can't do that anymore. It is creating new physical ailments this fear. It's like a part of my brain is " on" fear all the time.
I try to stay busy and do the toolbox thing but this is a sunami of fear not a speed bump. Im so tired. Ugh. ABB
@amiableBlackberry92
ami blackberry, I understand how you are feeling. I wish I could be there for you to talk to when you want and need to. I know how it is feeling so alone, as no one really understands it all. It does take a big toll after many decades for sure. The pile just stays there and grows. I know what you mean about staying busy and that helping.
But, no it never does stop it all from keeping to come back and back and over time, and grow bigger and stronger when it comes.
Just some peace, some sleep, the basic things are so important if they can come at times.
When you've been through things starting in childhood, then years in adulthood, no one really can understand or grasp it. Most people have trouble with one incident. It is a huge difference.