Pushing people away in order to feel safe
I have this horrible habit of pushing people away when I am feeling unloved. Tonight I pushed away a friend bc it was easier to know she now has a reason to not text me versus her just choosing not to. I was feeling ignored and needing attention and lonely. And in the moment, the push feels like relief, but then the loneliness kicks in and you realize that it was a very temporary fix to a much larger issue.
Oliver. I do the same thing. I push away my friends and family with the same thoughts. But THEY don’t know what you are thinking and feeling. It is easier not to have anyone , but everyone needs friends and family. I have let my friends know that if I do this to them, what it means. So now they know how to support me My family is screwed up so they don’t get it nor do they want to. But let your friends know that sometimes you get like this. I do it when I’m overwhelmed. I shut down. And yes, I get lonely. But I have to do it sometimes just to get a handle on my situation. And it’s ok. Just don’t do it out of anger or self pity. Really think about it while you’re NOT in the moment. You can do this!
Oliver, is there more info to share? I would like to help you if I can. I know how you feel and maybe I can help.