I can't be touched sexually
I have a long term boyfriend and I can't stand to let him even touch the inside of my thigh because of incidents that happened when I was younger. I'm at the point where I want to be physically intimate in a relationship but how can I get over the past
Awww :/ Caroline, i understand how frustrating and sad that can be for you and indeed it is a major crisis, you can message me if you'd like to talk about it ...
Dont worry... talk to your boyfriend about it... tell him everything ... if he actually loves you and understands you...then definately he will show efforts to make you comfortable with him... and just let go of your past... things will definately go on a next level... its difficult but not impossible... try.... hope this helped... and dont worry....:)
It might take a while. I was hit a lot and trained to think of men as using women, and i used to jerk at night with backflashes. On my firstexperience without going even very far, about half and hour later i couldn't breathe well, andi broke out in hives and felt sick. Ifinally found a guy i was comfortable with and he was patient and so kind to me, and when i would freak out he would stop, i would explain what was going on in my head, and he would comfort me with words and wait until i was ready to do whatever or not do whatever. I think i have been finally able to see that love in the sexual form can be a beautiful thing, and I did not even have the experiences that you have. If he is really a patient and loving man, it will show. If you haven't already, I would consider talking to him about it in a setting where you would feel comfortable, whether that's in publicor semi-private in case you cry, or private if you trust him, whatever works for you...if you think it would be a good idea. But these things can be tough to work through, and it helps to have a counselor that understands you to help you through too. I am just saying, don't give up. please. even if he doesn't take it well. then you will need people there for you for sure.and don't think you are weird. you are strong stronger than you know and i am so proud of you.
Yes talk to your boyfriend about it imsure he will understand, and is gonna be patient. if he gives you a hug or other type of stimulation that is not crossing the line so tell to yourself : this is ok, its fine, is normal. and work with this thoughts daily :)
I totally agree. I had to get used to dancing and handshakes and hugs from guys that were not even sexually interested in me and recognize this and find decent ways of physical communication without fear. You can do this, though you have more to overcome, i believe in you!
