Nobody takes me seriously, not even on here.
"He's just bad at understanding social cues."
"I know him, and he'd never do that intentionally."
"It's kind of something you just need to expect in that sort of environment."
I hear all kinds of stupid stuff like this. Even here on 7 cups, I've had listeners say that i can learn a lesson from it, the lesson apparently being to not be so trusting of people. I've had listeners on here who just wanted the details so they could be creepy and get off on reading the details of what happened.
Nobody is taking me seriously. I'm struggling to remember what actually happened despite being sober at the time.
I woke up my roommates screaming from a nightmare.
I feel so stupid for being this upset about it. I know people who've been assaulted in WAY worse ways. I'd barely consider this assault. It was at least partially my fault for not asking him to stop. But it's still affecting me. And after getting broken up with not long after it happened, I just don't know where to go. I feel disgusting. Her cutting things off with me just fed into the "you're disgusting/tainted now, and nobody wants you" narrative. It shouldn't be bothering me so much, but it is.
@milkshaketurtle
You have every right to be upset about this. It sounds like you are being treated very badly by the very people who should be providing you with support. I'm so sorry you are suffering so much. I just want you to know that I believe you. The things people are saying to you stem from stigma, but what happened is never your fault.
Try to be gentle with yourself during this difficult time. My thoughts are with you.
@milkshaketurtle I don't think it's ever stupid to be upset over something that felt harmful to you, regardless of whether you classify it as assault or not. Your feelings matter, no matter what anyone else has gone through, and while I don't know the scenario, it seems clear that this event was frightening and uncomfortable for you (if not even greater negative feelings), and therefore you have every right to be upset about it. You're also allowed to be upset by the, let's be honest, horrible feedback you've recieved when trying to reach out about it. No one should be made to feel like a negative situation was their fault or that it should be a "lesson", or to feel like an exhibit for someone's entertainment. It's fine if someone wants to take a bad experience and use it for their own growth, but that shouldn't be the default position from people who should be providing support. Your feelings should have been validated, especially here, it's not up to listeners to determine what an event meant or how you should react to it, they should have taken you and your emotions seriously, and simply provided validation and let you talk through it however works best for you.