Overcoming childhood molestation and abusive relationship.

I don't know if this is the right place for this but I'm at a loss. There was an older man in my life when I was little whom I loved and trusted. I have grown a lot since that time I have finally realized what was happening when I was little. He would touch me, kiss my entire body or just lay on top of me giving me "massages". And I didn't know how wrong that was until I got into a relationship years later. This relationship ended sour when he tried to forcibly abuse me (we are both religious and so sex is a sin) I told him not to but he kept trying to feel me up and force himself on me. I got out of that relationship and found myself in another abusive relationship a few months ago, this time he was emotionally abusive, and would degrade me to all end. This past relationship is the first person I had ever told about my childhood trauma and I feel like he didn't even care or listen to me. I feel so hurt and betrayed that I don't even know how to go about life right now and trust people. I have never told my mother about this and thankfully all these men who have hurt me are out of my life with where I am living right now. How can I go about feeling confident again and learning to trust men again?

edited by dancingRainbow45 on 06/05/17 Edited as this post is moving to Traumatic Experiences community. Please see guidelines re: No graphic descriptions in posts to avoid triggering others. Thanks