Heavy on me today!!

@scarletOcean2088

We can't "make" anyone feel anything, as long as it's not something physical being done. Whether words of kindness or offensiveness, and even if the feelings seem reflexive, we have the autonomy to interpret the words and choose how we react. 

When you hear, "I can't help but be angry..." If that's what you believe, then that belief is what's actually forcing you to be angry in that moment. In the same situation, someone else may say, "I don't need to care at all about that."  

The same relational dynamic is true about opinions of each other.  My opinion of you doesn't change who you are, nor does it have any actual power to offend you. You can give it such power by assigning value to it.  If my or anyone else's opinion of you is negative, there's an extremely high probability that we're wrong about you. Amazingly, if my opinion of you is positive, it's an equal or greater probability that it's correct.  

Often negative opinions manifest solely because the person forming them is in some kind of emotional pain. Yet we're likely to take their opinion personally - unless we take the time to give the encounter, and the other person's emotional state into consideration.

Sadly, many of us are in distressed states and our opinions about each other are negatively influenced by such emotional pain. 

For that reason, it's worth gently guiding our "default" reaction from being offended to considering what pain may have precipitated the offense, and what kind of reaction can promote positivity and healing.  

@scarletOcean2088

Well I wont say feel ill say an emotion I gave you