What are the top three emotions you hate?

@Peonywisteria22 

As someone with an official bpd diagnosis from a licensed professional. Feelings of any kind usually turn into something challenging and difficult to handle regardless of their nature these three being the ones base in my personal experience being some of the worst: 

guilt- guilt is an emotion i’ve dealt with the most throughout my upbringing although not guilt elicited by consequence. I speak of guilt elicited by constant incrimination and judgment exercised upon one by family or peers for merely existing differently from what they believe or expect from you whether it be religious conflict, small disagreements, straying from convention, or even small things like hobbies. They are harmless and they hurt no one yet i can’t help but feel guilty even if i never did anything wrong. Those who claim to love you sometimes are the one that hurt you the most, they can be the ones to undermine and warp your perception of yourself and by instilling a negative narrative about yourself in your mind, a false narrative that derives from personal biases and even the intent of manipulation at times yet one that can quickly become part of your identity which in turn turns guilt into a perpetual state of being and a catalyst for splitting. I am better about it now that i have had help with it but sometimes guilt resurfaces and lingers every now and then.

love- love in my experience has also always been an emotion that i associate with pain rather than the pleasant nature its known for. I don’t allow access to my heart to many since i tend to guard it at all times but when i do i wear it on my sleeve and that ultimately ends in getting hurt or fallout. It hurts To love people because in the end i can’t help but feel replaceable regardless of what i do. It hurts to love and try my best to express the depth of my gratitude only for my efforts to become undermined by my mood swings and ultimately overshadowed by the negative. It’s like the rift between me and those i love simply becomes bigger and deeper no matter how much i try to reach out and get closer. 

Emptiness- this is technically not an emotion since it’s the absence of it  but it’s not at all bearable nor pleasant just the rest of them. These moments of disconnect happen frequently and they make me feel fake, it makes for a form of cognitive dissonance, it’s disorienting and sometimes makes me feel like there is no authenticity to what i feel.  

Same for me