IceBreaker :D
I always try to make everyone happy but I'm really really messed up inside too many insecurities and self doubts
@Jolajide
This is relatable on so many levels!
@Jolajide very relatable
@Jolajide
I have been there ik how u feel
I write too but no one sees them because I delete them
i'm a registered EMT!
@ItsBrit02 unfortunately i can't practice right now because of transportation issues ):
@ItsBrit02 that's awesome! I hope the issues get resolved soon :)
@zealousGrace5023
Maybe that I have 11 grandchildren. Also that I am educated. I earned a BA and MBA that I was never given the chance to use... depressing, but it is what it is... boils down to age discrimination.
@EmbStitcher33 i'm sorry you never got the opportunity but hey maybe there might still be a chance you never know
also i cant imagine how fun it must be having 11 grandchildren
@zealousGrace5023
I wish... they're all so far away... two here, but rarely get to see them.
@EmbStitcher33 Aww i'msorry :/
@zealousGrace5023
I am unsure of who I am so I copy some people with certain things, like speech types or the way they walk. I kind of take a part of someone else and use it. Most things don’t last for very long though. I have started to realize that because I don’t know who I am I can teach myself how to be my ideal self, who is confident, sensitive, strong, intelligent, and independent. Anyways yeah I’m trying to create a person out of myself. This is a long post lol😛
I’m gonna add to that so yeah if you’re still reading this here we go. I also feel stressed out all the time because I play lots of sports and also am looking to get a job. I am having a hard time even paying my phone bill cause I have so many other responsibilities that earning money come last. For example, my Tuesday would go like this:
Wake up at 5:45 to go to the gym before school and then get home and rinse off to head to school.
2:45 school is finally over and I go to track practice
4:00 leave track to go lift weights with the football team.
6:15 get picked up by dad to go to dinner with the family.
9:00 go back to mom’s house and do home jobs, homework, take a shower, go to bed.
Thanks for suffering through me complaining about my “poor sad” life😁😁
@AlWaYShuNgRY411 that's pretty hectic
if all the sports dont make you happy maybe drop one?
also about the finding identity thing, we all learn through modeling. When we're babies we model our parents and as our environment grows we start modeling more people. Our personalities and identities are an aggregate of parts of our environment and genetic factors.
So you don't have to feel inauthentic for copying others because that's really how all of us figure ourselves out
a trial and error of what traits we like and dont like
some we take on knowingly and others unknowingly
take your time and keep trying until you find what feels right to you :)
Well I believe that most don't know about my problem solving skills...
@Challenger welp unlucky for them then and possibly lucky for you cause you wont get roped into other people's issues :p
most people dont know im writting my own story
@Allysen12 that's super cool tho
good luck with it :)
@zealousGrace5023
thank you i hope to publish it one day
@Allysen12 i hope you will too :)
@zealousGrace5023 Ehe, people didn't know that I'm alway stuck in my fantasy world :')
How about you Author? I would love to know <3
@Kanai61
I'm always stuck in my own fantasy world too! It's pretty fun, apart from the times when I procrastinate from doing something that I need to do. Lol
@Kanai61 i am constantly daydreaming and playing music in my head haha
poster child for maladpative daydreaming i swear
most people don't know cause i don't like sharing the daydreams or the fact that i spend hours pacing in my room doing nothing but daydreaming and listening to music
@zealousGrace5023
I have self-published a book.
@StormLynx ooh that's so cool
what's it about
@zealousGrace5023
It is a book of poetry about all the times that I have been alone. It is has a lot of dark poetry and prose in it that I have written over the years. :)
@StormLynx that's incredible
@zealousGrace5023
Thank you! It is a little discouraging that it hasn't sold many copies, but I am going to do my best to keep trying...
@zealousGrace5023
that i like to write poetry and stories, was working on a novel but stopped due to stress, i am a deep thinker and like to think deeply about certain things. that history, cinema, politics, music, philosophy and books are my favorite topics to talk about though i might not be that knowledgeable in them and i do not want people to go away , i am just shy and cannot express myself properly and yes hurtful remarks hurt me even if it looks like it dose not.
@philosophersstone68 i feel you
i'm sorry you feel too stressed to write i know what it's like to feel too overwhelmed to even do something enjoyable
i hope you feel better
@zealousGrace5023
my parents see writing as a less important activity, they want me to focus on my college and graduation degree that i just absolutely despise, i try my very hard in the process i am not able to keep writing.
/;@philosophersstone68 i'm sorry that's very frustrating :/