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Hello,
I don't know what to say about me but i thought it would be cool to introduce myself. I am a very good listener in my life, but I haven't found anybody listening to me. It came to a point that i am wondering to myself what is wrong with me and the reasons why I feel like I don't belong anywhere. I mean..humans are gregarious. So i also am gregarious. I rarely show that I don't feel good. Always funny, carrying, and open to the world. But truly...people run away from me when I need somebody to talk to. So i keep everything inside and I became very shy about showing my true feelings.and this is a circle you know. The more you keep everything inside because you can't express yourself, the more you don't know how to get out of this hole you have dig yourself. I have been lost for a while, then i found myself..and now I feel like myself is being lost one more time. I'm here because i don't want to lose myself anymore. I am an extremely good listener in real life..but sometimes listeners need to have a confident too.
Other than that, i am 31 years old and I am an Asian born and raised in France, living in Usa :) You can't beat me in ackwardness and kindness. Despite of my hidden dark side, i still do love conversing with people, helping and i am very creative and imaginative. I have an infinite hunger of life, maybe too much, so my curiosity leads me to research any kind of random stuffs. It makes me just wonder now..maybe i am too boring ? 
@Weirdbrain Wow, it sounds like you just described my teen/young adult years! I was always the doormat, listening to my friends and being the stupid big mouth at the parties just for attention. Now at 33 I am suffering the consequences b/c I really don't know how to express my feelings and it is hurting my marriage. NEVER say that you are a boring person. You are not. I was teased as a little kid b/c I was a girl and I liked Pokemon and Beanie Babies. Fast forward to this generation and Pokemon is so cool! Everyone has something special to offer this world. We are all unique. You come from France? That is awesome! My great grandma was an immigrant to the US from France, but my great grandpa is an immigrant from Belgium. I guess they met on a boat coming here. lol I know it's hard to build a little courage to be your complete self in front of everyone, but if someone makes a negative comment, they are just insecure w/themselves. You are special.
@TransAm85 hello, it's nice to meet you. Thank you for this nice post and i am sorry you have felt what i am living right now. Except that i just don't feel comfortable to attract attention on me and i am way too shy to be silly at parties. The fact i am saying i am too boring is because when i need some support in some ways, everybody disappears, just like they just want the "happy" me who asks no help. I really came to a point where I have to be quiet to live in society. And it is including my fiance unfortunately. It hurts so much when you just need a shoulder to rest a minute but the only thing who makes you feel secure is your loyal pillow.
@Weirdbrain Ahh, I know what you are saying .. I have had friends do that to me and that is why I say I was always a doormat. If you keep yourself in a shell forever though and not express all your true feelings, one day you will just snap and that is not good. I know this all to well b/c I hold my feelings in a lot .. I have catered to what my husband wants to hear and wants me to be and now after 7 years I think he's already gotten the picture that I'm still not being myself 100%. It sucks and I know that I need help to stop that hostility. I have never been to France, but I would love to go there! Only other country I've been to is Mexico. I was so scared of the airplanes b/c that was my first time going on them.
@TransAm85 and yes, i come from France :) my parents were from Laos and moved to France, and then i moved to Usa a few years ago. Do you go sometimes in France ? 😁
@Weirdbrain
Hey, my friend I do understand what you
are saying I have similar problems as
well when it comes to communicating
@goldenLychee4022 hello, It is nice to meet you. I won't say that i am happy to hear that you feel the same because i am not. But somewhere it is soothing to know that i am not the only one who feels the same. We can help each other in this nice website :)
