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Why can't I get my ex partner off my mind?

22 Answers
Last Updated: 01/21/2020 at 3:14am
1 Tip to Feel Better
United States
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Jackie Dross, M.S. Community Counseling


I have a passion for working with people from a non-judgmental, strengths based approach to meet their goals for personal growth.

Top Rated Answers
August 4th, 2015 1:01am
You can't get your ex partner off of you mind because you probably still love them and care about them a lot. I have been in your shoes before and it's not easy. The bad news is that you may not be able to ever get this person completely off of your mind. The good news is that you may be able to keep from thinking about them as much, but sometimes we can't control what/who we think about.
June 23rd, 2018 9:29am
I gave so much of myself to this relationship and I never saw the signs of him cheating when I found out he left without a word...I don't know what it is that wanted to hear him say. Because I now realise he never loved me the same way I loved him....He moved in with the other woman immediately ....that hurts me so much...its 3months now and I still think about him. I don't want him back I want to move on but find it so hard.
December 21st, 2015 8:01am
Simply because you're not willing to. You want to stay stuck to the old memories; you still can't quite digest the fact that it's over. You're lacking self-belief to go out there and find another partner, and more importantly you're not making an effort to leave an old habit behind - the habit of being used to your ex-partner day in day out, being more or less dependent on him/her,
August 3rd, 2015 5:37pm
He/she played a massive and important role in your life, this is normal. You loved this person and cared for this person.
September 20th, 2016 3:30am
Usually when an ex partner is on your mind, there is usually something you miss about them romantically or physically.
June 8th, 2015 11:38am
something is special from ex partner which make a intense on our memory so we can not off our mind.when other person have same speciality then we recall our ex.
February 23rd, 2015 7:15pm
From experience, sometimes it takes time to get over a relationship. It is completely normal to think about your ex partner for a long time afterwards. Although, i cant answer directly why, this is completely normal part of getting over that ex.
April 7th, 2015 12:58am
I think its normal to think of your ex's. Because you once shared that bond of love for them and love can never be forgotten
April 11th, 2016 4:56am
You can't get your ex partner off your mind because you are still living in the past memories. The future is waiting for you. Go chase it!
March 20th, 2017 9:59pm
Getting over a partner isn't quick or easy, it takes time and patience. It may seem like it will last forever but it won't.
July 5th, 2016 5:59am
I believe that if you got together with someone in the first place, it means that you had seen something in him/ her in the first place. You had seen something in that person worth cherishing and holding so dear. More often than not, we cannot get our exes off our minds because of the memories and emotions they brought us. Even if it's just a little sliver of attachment, it is bound to have a deep-seated place in our hearts most of the time. And that is natural. What is more important is to never stop looking forward, and to never lose sight of one's other goals in life. (:
February 23rd, 2016 8:38am
The only obvious reason for that is you still love him which is only natural. What isn't natural is not being able to move on and start being productive.
May 2nd, 2016 6:39pm
maybe because we spend more time clinging on to their memories rather than working on moving on and concentrating on our own lives
May 27th, 2019 5:53pm
Having a meaningful connection with someone that ends can be (and usually is) upsetting. And as we have spent so much time with them, getting to know them and "letting them in" its only natural that when the relationship comes to its conclusion that there is a type of void where they once were in your life. And that void takes time to heal. Its loss - and the healing from loss takes time / self care and in time we begin to think of them less as our world expands again to new possibilities. We never forget as they part of who we are now, but we do continue with life.
January 21st, 2020 3:14am
because perhaps you have unresolved feelings or issues that are unresolved, most of the time people end relationships immaturely, as in no breakup process, or slow separation, there are many ways to end a relationship in a healthy way, perhaps a closure is another reason. I think that when it comes down to it, communicating with the person also helps understand what is going on, if you are in the kind of dynamic with this person to work it out, it might be beneficial for both of you. Closure, unresolved feelings, back breakup process, and hey, huge space of someone that's not a big part of your life anymore is another one.
February 25th, 2015 8:29pm
they probably made an impact on your life, whether good or bad. but one day you will. and you will feel the relief and you will be able to find a new partner
May 18th, 2015 8:01pm
what I have done in the past was talk with them about how I feel. im the kind of person to tell people how I feel not hold it back because it doesn't go anywhere when no one knows. some things you can also do isdo things to keep your mind off it, read or hang with friends or do something that keeps you from thinking of you ex so then they will slowly become less of a mind topic.
August 17th, 2015 6:08pm
It can be hard to get someone you cared about off of your mind. They were a part of your life for a while and probably had some kind of influence on you. What you can do to help those thoughts is focus on something different. Take up a hobby that requires focus or just put more focus into your current job or schooling.
December 8th, 2015 5:03am
Most likely because you were bonded with that person. It can be hard to have someone leave your life so suddenly but time heals everything. It'll eventually get better and you'll have that person off of your mind!
June 17th, 2015 11:34am
It could be love. If you are angry for no reason about it, by any chance, its normal as well.I am sorry for your situation.
September 15th, 2015 2:08pm
What I did to get them off my mind was surrounding my self with my friends. My friends knew that the break up was hard on me so they tried to keep me distracted. Another thing to do is find a new hobby that you like. Good luck :*
April 25th, 2016 4:43pm
It takes time .... it won't happen immediately after what both of you went through ... but give it some time soon you will move on :)