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Why do I get picked on?

16 Answers
Last Updated: 04/28/2020 at 2:21am
1 Tip to Feel Better
United States
Moderated by

Polly Letsch, LCSW

Clinical Social Work/Therapist

I provide non-judgmental, person-centered, objective therapeutic treatment for individuals of all ages to improve social, emotional, mental and other areas of functioning.

Top Rated Answers
VirtualVirgo
February 23rd, 2015 7:31am
You may get picked on because you are different in some perceived way. It could be grades, appearance, friends, economic status, orientation, or anything that might make you stand out from others. They may continue because they get a reaction out of you.
Anonymous
June 14th, 2016 12:34pm
I'd hate to tell you this. But it's probably because you're amazing. I don't know anybody in this world who has got picked on for being like everybody else. There is always something weird about them. In time ,you'll see this weirdness is genius.
Ashleah
February 23rd, 2015 9:39pm
No one deserves to be picked on. If you're getting picked on it's not a reflection of who you are, it's a reflection on the person who is picking on you. Obviously they don't have many great things going on in their lives or they wouldn't care enough to pick on you. Make yourself feel good by being clean, wearing decent clothes, and maybe putting on a little makeup or doing something nice with your hair. Do this to feel good about yourself don't do it for others.
Shikamaru42
December 22nd, 2015 12:46am
Most probably because you're different. Well, all people are different, no two of us are the same. But you most likely have some trait that those who pick on you cannot stand. Possibly because they don't have it and they envy you or because they do have it and they feel you outshining them (if that trait is something they use to distinguish themselves). However, something keeps these people from just ignoring (or acknowledging) your trait and moving on. And this something is probably the answer to your question.
Anonymous
May 24th, 2015 4:59pm
Because people are cruel and life isn't fair and sometimes things suck. And I'm very, very sorry that happens to you. I have gotten picked on a lot in my life too, and I always blamed myself, but in the end it was really the bully that had something going on with them that made them make the poor choice of choosing to take it out on others in order to cope. It's wrong of them, for sure, but not everyone knows how to healthily cope with pain. Many people take it out on themselves, but there are the fair few who will take it out on anyone else they can.
T1137
July 18th, 2016 2:09am
This is a tough question. People get picked on because (usually) the bully is not comfortable with himself/herself/their self. Perhaps the bully sees something different about you or something that they wish they had/didn't have - it scares them. Instead of having someone help them to understand what they're feeling, they choose to pick on others. To them, it makes them feel powerful - it makes them feel like they're alright even if they are not. The best thing to do is to talk to an adult about what is happening - someone whom you trust and can speak freely with. The next time the bully picks on you, try to show compassion because they are going through a difficult time in their life whether they want to admit it out loud or not.
Anonymous
April 16th, 2015 1:42am
because of how people think of you. how you dress, how you walk, talk, look, race, and so on. everyone has to be mean ay one point and it justs hurts you so much. they are saying it to be cool and have all the power in the world when they really don't
RachxTheLight
June 22nd, 2015 1:31am
There is no real answer to this, other than the person doing it doesn't realize the harm that causes. They may have had some issues themselves, but it is never alright to pick on someone.
bubblyNight88
September 6th, 2016 1:41pm
We all get picked on once in a while but it's only because we have something that others wish they had
floatingonatidalwave
September 14th, 2015 11:22pm
The person picking on you isn't feeling good about themselves. They're going through a rough patch and feel that they need to take things out on others. There's likely a part of you that they admire and wish they had themselves, so jealousy plays a part in it too.
Anonymous
October 27th, 2015 10:04am
Very often when i am picked on, I question the motives of my bullies. Perhaps there is something I should change about myself and very often it is at this point that i reevaluate my life and improve on my weaknesses. That said, this is not always the case and some people are out there purely to make you feel bad so don't always take it to heart
KorhanLOral
November 23rd, 2015 10:48pm
You get picked on because the people who pick on you are trying to project their insecurities towards you. These people who verbally, emotionally or physically attack you are afraid of being judged, so they find someone to pick on to look "cool" or "self confident". Stand up for yourself. Don't take this abuse.
Anonymous
January 31st, 2017 9:52am
People tend to pick on others because of their own insecurities. They're upset with themselves, their home life, their social life, could be a number of things. As far as the people who are targeted, it could be the way you react to the bullying. If you make a big scene, this could be entertainment for the not-so intelligent of the bullies, and they'll do it more. If you try your best to react as little as possible, it'll likely help. However, if you're in the situation where the little or big reactions make no difference, standing up for yourself is important. Look for help from an authority figure, too.
AllieSunshine
April 28th, 2020 2:21am
Bullies focus on children or adults who stand out in some way. In schools, lesbian, gay, bisexual, or transgender (LGBT) youth, children with disabilities, and socially isolated youth may be at an increased risk of being bullied. A recent study showed that autistic children are more prone to bullying. Bullies will often pick on people who they feel won’t fight back—the people who are nice and try to get along with everyone. You may be being picked on because you are independent. You may be picked on because the people or person is going through a hard time and they just so happen to take it out on you.
thantophobiaxo
July 13th, 2015 12:32am
I've had a lot of insecurities while growing up, one of which was my weight and my emotions. While growing up a lot of people bullied me on my weight. They would call me anorexic and make fun of how short I was. I still go through it, which sucks. I'm not any of that, I have high matabalism. I also got called a cry baby all the time because I'm very sensitive so I get emotional easily. It's tough but it's nothing I can't over come.
ZenWorksZA
January 15th, 2018 2:04pm
There are many reasons for this, you either have something that the other person wants. You are different and it makes you stand out of the crowd which isn't always a bad thing. They might continue to pick on you if they get a reaction out of you.