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Why do I have no friends?

11 Answers
Last Updated: 05/22/2017 at 10:41pm
1 Tip to Feel Better
United States
Moderated by

Elaine Kish, LMSW

Clinical Social Work/Therapist

My goal is to treat clients with respect and compassion. I am a supportive, strengths-based therapist with experience in treating mood disorders, grief, and trauma.

Top Rated Answers
Anonymous
October 4th, 2016 8:36am
because you are not your own friend. you don't accept yourself for who you are, that's friendship, people see that, they can feel it, they won't want to be your friend, cause they know you won't accept them for who they actually all, with all the flaws, with all the shortcomings.
Anonymous
April 14th, 2015 5:52am
You're amazing and they envy you because in the future you'll be better than them. But you're also being saved for a very special friend that will never leave your side.
AlessandroBaricco
November 2nd, 2015 11:09am
Relaying on others may very inconvenient for those who you relay on. Staying on your ground makes more sense and it is more attractive. Being strong may bring also the friends you want. On the other side, it's OK and normal not to have any friends, if you are extremely introvert. Accept you situation and think about what you want to change in your life. Start from there and all it be OK.
Funfloor
April 25th, 2015 5:41am
As I have not walked a day in your shoes, I am not able to give you any specific advice. But try to know one new person in one month. That can help you.
Anonymous
April 25th, 2015 6:29pm
I believe only you can answer that :) I think the question must be... What keeps you from having "no friends" ? And whatever it may be, I guess that's another thing that we could talk about. :)
Mogsyt
May 15th, 2015 10:23am
I ask myself this question everyday. But what is a friend? im in secondry school, we have 900 kids and I don't connect with one of them. But I know out there somewhere when I go to collage maybe, theres going to be people like me and people who have the same interests ect. in the mean time message people once in a while, make plans get to know them, and maybe when they get to know you you could be friends. don't be afraid to ask
Anonymous
September 22nd, 2015 4:47pm
Now this is a hard question, as friends is a particular term for people who you see on a regular basis. For example, you can have work friends or close friends. So if you know you have people who you see everyday, or even once in a while, you have friends.
InvisibleMonster
April 25th, 2016 10:23pm
Maybe you have lost them or things could have slipped away without you realizing it, but you can always make new friends or try to reconnect with old ones its a hard step to take but its definitely possible
Anonymous
June 14th, 2016 1:59am
To get friends, you need to go out places and make friends! Try to find people with the same interests as you:)
StayPositiveFriend
September 12th, 2016 2:03pm
I apologise beforehand if I miss the mark with this answer but its a difficult question to answer without any further context or background. Speaking from my own experience, the common reasons for not having friends: 1. You simply don't care about people and are genuinely happier alone. People like this are incredibly rare, even if some tell themselves this is the case it is usually not true. The fact that you are asking this question would suggest this is not the case with you. 2. You are shy, introvert or have difficulty communicating with people. A very common situation and made significantly worse if you have recently moved somewhere new. The trick is to take baby steps. Don't expect yourself to go to some big party and make a ton of new friends. If you like gaming try some online games, great way to meet people with similar interests in a way that is less requiring of strong social skills. High chance that the people you meet will not be in your neighbourhood but that is totally fine - remember: baby steps. Online friends first, get used to the interaction, friendly banter, humour and other traits that can help with social interaction. When you feel more confident you can then move on to local events, sports/hobby club, school, work, gym, etc. Anywhere where you can meet people that have similar interests to you. Take your skill set that you have practised online and apply to the real world. 3. You don't do or go anywhere where you can actually meet people to make friends with. Especially common if you have just recently moved somewhere. An important ingredient to making a new friend is meeting other people. People with similar interests tend to be the best groups for finding friends so consider joining some kind of club or group activity that you are interested in. And there is something out there for everyone! Might be only an online group to start with (see point 2) but this can lead to a real world group later on, and its OK to start small and safe. Always keep in mind: baby steps - no need to rush this. Friendships can last a life time, focus on building them and making them strong. And stay positive! Think about solutions to finding friends and less on the problem of not currently having any.
MrMeNr1
- Expert in Bullying
May 22nd, 2017 10:41pm
Simply put, because you're not looking. So, look around. Who do you appreciate talking to? Who do you have fun with at school/work? They could all be your friends, you'll just have to realise it.